Early on the morning of April 15, an unidentified driver smashed his yellow Mustang into a fence in unincorporated Marin County, California, KPIX reported. California Highway Patrol Officer Andrew Barclay later recounted what followed: The driver tried to back out of the fence, but failed to realize he was in drive and crashed through a home instead. The homeowner came out to investigate and, noting the driver's impaired state, removed the keys from the Mustang and returned inside to call police. The driver then discovered the keys inside the homeowner's Toyota and tried to make his getaway, Barclay said, but he shifted the car into drive and barreled through the house once more, coming to rest alongside his Mustang. When the homeowner again tried to take the keys away, the driver allegedly hit him repeatedly, causing major injuries. CHP arrested the driver for suspicion of DUI involving drugs, battery and theft of a vehicle. [KPIX, 4/15/2020]

Bright Ideas

-- Many hospital workers are self-isolating to keep their families safe from COVID-19 exposure, but Corpus Christi, Texas, emergency room doctor Jason Barnes, 39, is taking a novel approach: He's moved into his kids' treehouse in his backyard. Barnes told the Caller Times on April 20 that he's lived in the treehouse for about three weeks. If he needs something, he'll shout down to the kids or call the house. "(T)he Wi-Fi reaches the treehouse, so I have my laptop and my own little command center here," Barnes said. He uses a camping toilet with disposable bags, and he either showers at the hospital or "my oldest son will rig up a water hose. ... Luckily, my fence is pretty tall." As for when he can re-enter the house, Barnes said, "We're always looking at the CDC and Gov. Greg Abbott's decision, but the final determinator is the wife." [Caller Times, 4/20/2020]

-- The Washington Examiner reported on April 21 that some people appear to be spending their coronavirus stimulus checks on another kind of stimulation. The adult live model site Cams.com says it has seen a surge in traffic. "Since April 13, we've seen a 22% uptick in traffic to our livestreaming site, and tips to our models have increased by 40%," said Gunner Taylor, director of strategic development for FriendFinder Networks, of which Cams.com is a part. Traffic from Washington state is up 204%, and it's up 83% in Illinois, but it's down in Washington, D.C., by 29%. [Washington Examiner, 4/21/2020]

The Entrepreneurial Spirit

At the Peace N Peas Farm in Indian Trail, North Carolina, owners Francie and Mark Dunlap have launched a new career for their 8-year-old mini donkey, Mambo, and their other horses. For $50, Mambo, Eddie, Zeus or other animals will make a 10-minute guest appearance to liven up your next videoconference, the Charlotte Observer reported. You can even give the four-legged interloper the on-screen name of a regular attendee: For instance, Zeus might become Paul, the guy who asks too many questions. The Dunlaps also arrange for their animals to visit classrooms or happy hours. [Charlotte Observer, 4/19/2020]

Reports of My Death

Cancer patient Gladys Rodriguez Duarte, 50, was rushed to a clinic in Coronel Oviedo, Paraguay, on April 11, after her blood pressure shot up, according to the Paraguay National Police. Two hours later, Dr. Heriberto Vera declared her dead and shared the news with Duarte's family, but her daughter, Sandra, later told local media, "He assumed she was dead and ... they disconnected her and passed her off to the funeral home." The Daily Mail reported that funeral directors told investigators they were shocked to find she was breathing and moving around inside the body bag at the funeral home. Duarte was immediately transferred to another hospital for observation. [Daily Mail, 4/14/2020]

The Continuing Crisis

Geauga County (Ohio) Sheriff Scott Hildenbrand told WJW his office was called to break up a large party of Amish late on April 18 in Huntsburg Township. "When we got there, there was a barn full of people and some of them ran," he said. One partier was arrested for disorderly conduct, two were charged with underage drinking and another was issued a summons for violating the state's stay-at-home order, according to the sheriff. "We won't tolerate this," Hildenbrand said, "and we have to keep everybody safe." Amish people are reportedly continuing to gather in large groups, and the county health commissioner has sent a letter to Amish bishops about an increase in COVID-19 cases in that community. [WJW, 4/20/2020]

NOT COVID-19

An unnamed 22-year-old Chinese woman has spent the last 14 years trying to discover the cause of her persistent cough, which started when she suffered a serious fit of coughing as a child, Oddity Central reported on April 22. Over the years, she has been misdiagnosed numerous times, but as she recently prepared for an unrelated surgery, the mystery was solved. Dr. Wang Jiyong at Guangzhou University of Chinese Medicine ordered CT scans that revealed a foreign object in her right lung that turned out to be a chicken bone fragment just over half an inch long. Doctors said she had probably inhaled it at 8 years old, when the coughing started. [Oddity Central, 4/22/2020]

Ignorance Was Bliss

Elena Manighetti and Ryan Osborne, formerly of Manchester, England, followed their dream and have been sailing around the world on their boat since 2017. They were en route from the Canary Islands to the Caribbean, where they planned to dock on a small island in mid-March, but were surprised to discover the island's borders were closed because of a worldwide pandemic. "In February, we'd heard there was a virus in China, but ... we had figured by the time we got to the Caribbean in 25 days it would all be over," Elena told the BBC. The couple had told friends and family they didn't want to hear any bad news, but Elena is from the hard-hit Lombardy region of Italy and has since caught up with her family. "It's a very macabre picture at home, there are no more coffins, no more cemetery space. ... My family is thankfully safe ... but people we've known for years have died," Elena said. The couple was eventually able to dock in Saint Vincent, and they hope to head north before hurricane season starts in June. "We're sandwiched between the hurricane season and the virus," Elena said. [BBC, 4/21/2020]

Numbers Game

Doriana Fontanella contacted KDVR in Denver to report that she's been inundated with phone calls recently and she suspects she know why: Her mobile phone number is just one digit off Colorado's fax number for the Department of Labor and Employment, where people are trying to send applications for unemployment claims. "There's a real need out there, and I needed to let people know that I'm not the one they want," Fontanella told the station's Problem Solvers team. "I see on the news they're saying they can't get any response from unemployment, and I think that's because they're not getting the right number." [KDVR, 4/22/2020]

Inexplicable

Ethan Palazzo, 30, of Collingswood, New Jersey, was arrested by police in Old Forge, who found him naked inside a local funeral home on April 11. According to a criminal complaint, Palazzo allegedly broke into the Thomas P. Kearney Funeral Home around 8 p.m., then rummaged through the facility's chemical closet and left a cold bottle of beer in a display casket. The Citizens' Voice reported Palazzo smelled of alcohol and declined to give police a motive for his trespassing; he was charged with burglary, criminal trespass and criminal mischief. [The Citizen's Voice, 4/15/2020]

As leaders worldwide search for ways to encourage people to stay home during the coronavirus pandemic, officials in Indonesia are taking advantage of its citizens' superstitions, Reuters reported on April 13. Kepuh, a village on Java island, is employing village residents to dress as "pocong," or the trapped souls of the dead, in Indonesian folklore. The ghostly figures, wrapped in white shrouds with their heads covered and dark-rimmed eyes peering out, surprise unsuspecting pedestrians, then disappear into the night. The strategy appears to be working: Villagers have been seen running off in fright when the pocong appear. "People will not gather or stay on the streets after evening prayers," resident Karno Supadmo said. [Reuters, 4/13/2020]

Desperate Measures

Olive Veronesi, 93, of Seminole, Pennsylvania, wasn't shy about letting loved ones know what she needed during the lockdown. "I need more beer!" read a sign she held up, along with a can of Coors Light. A relative posted Veronesi's photo to social media, KDKA reported, and her predicament went viral. "I have a beer every night. ... I was on my last 12 cans. You know what, beer has vitamins in it. It's good for you, only don't overdo it," Veronesi said. On April 13, she got her wish: Molson Coors delivered 10 cases of her favorite brew to her front door. Her new sign reads, "Got more beer!" [KDKA, 4/13/2020]

Names in the News

-- A baby born on April 6 in Sheopur, Bhopal, India, will carry a special name with him through his life: Lockdown. Manju Mail, his mother, confirmed to hospital staff: "Yes, he is Lockdown, as he was born during the lockdown period." Her husband, Raghunath, told The Times of India: "It is a significant name. The whole world using lockdown as a means to stem this pandemic. We should not take Lockdown lightly." [Times of India, 4/9/2020]

-- Similarly, in Chhattisgarh, India, another couple blessed their twins, born March 27, with timely names: Corona and Covid. Preeti Verma, 27, told the Press Trust of India her children's names symbolize triumph over hardships. "Indeed the virus is dangerous and life-threatening, but its outbreak made people focus on sanitation, hygiene and inculcate other good habits," she said. [Press Trust of India via NDTV, 4/3/2020]

The Continuing Crisis

Los Angeles County Sheriff's deputies responded to a home in Saugus, California, on April 7 after a dispute over toilet paper turned violent, CNN reported. A 26-year-old man was arrested and charged with battery after his mother told deputies he had punched her. Sheriff's department spokesperson Shirley Miller said the man had accused his mother of hiding toilet paper, which she admitted to deputies, saying her son was using too much. "This is the first arrest I've heard of that started out over an argument over toilet paper," remarked Miller. [CNN, 4/8/2020]

Getting the Message Out

Civic-minded car designer Kanyaboyina Sudhakar of the Sudha Cars Museum in Bahadurpura, India, has built a one-seat vehicle in the shape of the coronavirus "so that awareness can be spread on social distancing," he told The Times of India on April 8. The six-wheeled Corona Car can go about 25 mph and took Sudhakar 10 days to build. "I have always made cars to give back to the society in my own way," Sudhakar said. "(I)t is important to tell people to stay home and stay safe, and the coronavirus car is meant to convey the message." [Times of India, 4/8/2020]

Priorities

As tornadoes bore down on the Southeast on April 12, an unnamed family sought safety in a storm shelter in Crossville, Alabama, but said they were turned away when they had only one face mask. The woman told WHNT a man who opened the door asked if they had masks. "I said I have one mask," the woman said. "He motioned no and shut the door." The family ran back to their car and looked for shelter elsewhere. Crossville Mayor Tera Fortenberry had posted the face coverings requirement on Facebook, but the family didn't see the message. After the story became public, masks were donated to the town anonymously. [WHNT, 4/14/2020]

Buried Treasure

A man in Heckmondwike, West Yorkshire, England, set out to build a deck in his back garden in early April and uncovered a mystery. As John Brayshaw, 40, began digging post holes, he unearthed an automobile buried on its side, Yahoo News UK reported. "I thought it was an old air raid shelter at first, then I saw the roof," Brayshaw said. "Then I kept digging and saw the door, the steering wheel and realized it was a full car, complete with the registration plate. The only thing that was missing was the wheels.” Brayshaw, who has owned the home for about six months, believes the 1955/56 Ford predates the previous owners, who resided in the home 50 years. [Yahoo News UK, 4/10/2020]

Inexplicable

-- Davis, California, resident Shaun Lamar Moore, 40, was arrested on April 12 and charged with burglary after allegedly stealing a specimen that was waiting to be tested for COVID-19 from the Sutter Davis Hospital. Authorities said hospital employees reported a person had entered the facility April 11 and removed the specimen, Fox News reported. That evening, police were alerted that a sealed COVID-19 specimen was found in a shopping cart at a nearby CVS store. Police Deputy Chief Paul Doroshov said the specimen "hadn't been opened or tampered with based on the security seals. ... Although the incident is very serious, detectives do not believe (Moore) intended to harm himself or others," he added. [Fox News, 4/13/2020]

-- Kevin Fallon, 30, of New York City reportedly sent warnings to friends and family on April 9 that he intended to blow up a bronze statue in Central Park depicting characters from "Alice in Wonderland," according to court documents. On April 11, he allegedly followed up with photos of a pipe bomb and ammunition, along with threats: "This is going to hurt. None of you are safe. I am lethal." At his mother's request, NYPD conducted a wellness check at his apartment that day and found three bombs, ammunition and knives that had been taped together, authorities said. The New York Post reported the bombs were found to be nonfunctional, and later that day, Fallon was found at a hotel in the city, where he was taken into custody and charged with making a terroristic threat. [NY Post, 4/14/2020]

Ewwwww

A new study has found the presence of a parasitic worm called Anisakis, or herring worms, in raw or undercooked seafood has increased 283-fold since the 1970s. Study co-author Chelsea Wood, assistant professor in the University of Washington's School of Aquatic and Fishery Sciences, said most people who've eaten the worms think they have food poisoning. The symptoms are much the same, she told United Press International, and they disappear after the worm in a few days. But the worms can reach 0.8 inches in length and are visible to the naked eye, Wood noted. While fish processors and sushi chefs are adept at removing the worms, she suggested cutting sushi in half and inspecting each piece if you're concerned. [United Press International, 4/14/2020]

Least Competent Criminal

Furquan Muhammad, 22, started his very bad encounter with law enforcement on April 11 when he sped off after being pulled over in Monroe County, Georgia, for not having a license tag, authorities said. Georgia State Patrol spokesperson Lt. Stephanie Stallings told the Atlanta Journal Constitution that as the car sped by, troopers saw "there were other passengers in the fleeing vehicle that appeared to be children." The chase went on through four counties, until Muhammad crashed into a state trooper's car, which then caused a chain reaction involving four police vehicles and injured two troopers, according to authorities. Along with Muhammad in the car, deputies said they found four children (ranging in age from 9 weeks to 15 years old), marijuana, Xanax pills, a firearm and $2,000 in cash. Muhammad was arrested on multiple charges. [Atlanta Journal Constitution, 4/14/2020]

Authorities executed a search warrant relating to a narcotics investigation in the South Texas town of Mercedes on March 25, but what they seized wasn't drugs. Drug Enforcement Administration Special Agent Sammy Parks told the Associated Press that officers had been warned there were exotic animals on the 5-acre property, and game wardens who joined the search found a white Bengal tiger, bobcat, kinkajou, porcupines, llamas, emus and deer. While no arrests were made, the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department had to euthanize three of the animals; the remainder were removed to the Austin Zoo for examination and rehabilitation. [Associated Press, 4/3/2020]

How the World Has Changed

-- Amy Simonson and Dan Stuglik proceeded with their planned wedding on April 4 in Pokagon, Michigan, but the coronavirus pandemic forced them to get creative. While the original guest list of 150 people had to be pared down repeatedly as restrictions were placed on public gatherings, Stuglik was determined that his bride not walk down the aisle between empty pews in the Old Rugged Cross Church. He hit upon the idea of filling the church with cardboard cutouts of family and friends and stopped by Menasha Packaging Co. to ask for help. Employees Ted Harris and Luke Arendash jumped at the chance. "(Stuglik) was just looking for a general person shape, but I was able to make it a little bit more realistic audience for them," Harris told The Herald Palladium. The company supplied more than 100 cutouts of varying sizes, shapes and hairstyles. The newlyweds moved their reception to October and canceled their honeymoon in Newport, Rhode Island, but Stuglik said they "both have peace now, because it's stripped down to what it should be, which is us and God, getting married." [Herald Palladium, 4/1/2020]

-- Our four-legged friends are taking advantage of the COVID-19 lockdown in multiple cities, United Press International reported: On March 31, 122 Kashmiri goats took over the Welsh town of Llandudno, eating gardens and sleeping in the yards; on April 6, residents of Calgary, Alberta, Canada, reported a large herd of deer casually wandering through neighborhoods; in Gir, Gujarat, India, citizens were warned on April 5 to stay inside not only because of the pandemic but because a large lion was nosing around the city; at a Fast Stop store in Gatlinburg, Tennessee, a bear took the low-traffic opportunity to dumpster dive on April 3; and in the Central Region of Singapore, witnesses captured video of a horse galloping through the empty streets of Bukit Timah on April 6. She had escaped from the Paisano Polo Academy, where the owner said she'd only been loose for about 20 minutes. [United Press International, various]

-- Recent sunny weather in the Czech spa town of Lazne Bohdanec, where sunbathing naked is allowed, brought out more than a hundred eager sunbathers -- nude and not -- but police were soon on hand to warn they still needed to wear face masks, as ordered by the Czech government, reported the Daily Mail. "Citizens can be without clothes in places designated for this purpose, but they must have their mouths covered and must observe the numbers in which they can go out into nature," police spokeswoman Marketa Janovska told local media. "We understand that many people do not have a garden and want to ventilate in the countryside," she added. About half of the 150 people were not wearing masks, but no fines were issued. [Daily Mail, 4/7/2020]

Coronavirus Cosplay

Police on horseback and motorcycles in Hyderabad, India, are reminding civilians about the dangers of COVID-19 by wearing large red masks and headdresses in the shape of the virus as they patrol. Police Commissioner Anjani Kumar said the masked officers would be stationed at various city junctions, Fox News reported. Ironically, the city organized a rally on April 7 to kick off the awareness campaign, displaying signs reading "Please Avoid Gathering" and "Social Distancing Is Social Responsibility." [Fox News, 4/7/2020]

Crowd Control

-- According to his attorney, Rumson, New Jersey, resident John Maldjian, 54, intended for his "Stay at Home" Pink Floyd cover concert to be viewed only on Facebook Live by his friends on April 4. However, at the last minute, Maldjian decided to play his guitar on his front porch, which drew a crowd. What started with a few neighbors eventually grew to about 30 people in his front yard when police showed up to enforce social distancing orders, NJ Online reported. One of the "partiers" allegedly became abusive, according to police, but attorney Mitchell J. Ansell said his client had "absolutely no malicious intentions ... and never wanted this to escalate." Maldjian was charged for violating emergency orders. [NJ Online, 4/6/2020]

-- A 21-year-old woman and her 61-year-old father, of Key West, Florida, told Monroe County Sheriff's officers they were on a boat off Wisteria Island April 4 where they spotted a group of about 20 college-aged people drinking on the beach, the New York Daily News reported. The woman said they approached the group and asked them to obey social distancing orders and keep the noise down, but the people became violent and struck both victims in the head with a baseball bat. Authorities said both sustained head injuries in the attack; the attackers jumped into three boats docked nearby and took off, and no one has been arrested. [NY Daily News, 4/7/2020]

Using the Weapons at Hand

-- Michigan State Police responding to a call in Gibson Township, Michigan, on April 6 seized a muzzleloader pistol from a man involved in a dispute over a camping trailer, authorities said. Trooper David Kaiser said officers discovered a 58-year-old man and a female relative had arrived at the property to pick up the trailer, but the 55-year-old man who lived there questioned its ownership. The resident fired the muzzleloader, hitting no one, said Kaiser, then allegedly used the gun to strike the older man, which prompted the woman to grab a shovel and hit the resident on the head. MLive reported police arrested the resident for felonious assault; further charges are pending. [MLive, 4/7/2020]

-- Shadae Miranda, 30, was charged with felony domestic battery in Fort Pierce, Florida, on April 4, after allegedly attacking a man with a "15.6-ounce metal can of Spaghettio's ... in a plastic bag," according to an arrest affidavit. The Smoking Gun reported the victim told police he and Miranda were sharing a room at the Travel Inn motel where, after he arrived "home from the hospital," the two began to argue. The victim told police he stepped outside to let things cool down, but Miranda followed him, wielding the Spaghettio's. She was arrested, but it was unclear whether the Spaghettio's were booked into evidence. [Smoking Gun, 4/7/2020]

People Are Good

Royal Mail postman Jon Matson still has to make his rounds in the English village of Boldon during the coronavirus lockdown, and he's doing what he can to "lift the spirits" of the residents he sees along the way. Matson, 39, has been sporting different costumes, including a Greek soldier, a cheerleader and Little Bo Peep -- all with the Royal Mail's blessing, as long as he wears his uniform shoes. "Everyone is uncertain at the moment, and you are the only person outside of the family that they see, so why not give them something to smile about," Matson told the Sunderland Echo on March 28. He's coy, though, about what sorts of costumes are on tap in the days to come. Zoe Grant, who lives on Matson's route, gushed: "I'm proud that Jon is my postman, and I can't wait to see his next costume." [Sunderland Echo, 3/28/2020]