DEAR ABBY: I was working out of town in a position that paid a good salary. When my adult son proposed to his girlfriend, I told him I would try and give him $10,000 for the wedding. Well, things changed. I had to return home for good, and my salary was cut. When I told my son I wouldn't be able to give him $10,000, but could give him only $5,000 instead, he became very upset and said, "You promised that amount and we were counting on that money!"

I feel a gift is a gift, and they should be happy with whatever I can manage. After talking it over with several friends, they all agreed that he is behaving inappropriately. I am single and trying to retire in 10 years. Please help. -- SALARY CUT IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR SALARY CUT: Your son's reaction was immature. He should understand that sometimes circumstances can change. If you haven't already explained why you need to cut back on the sum you planned to give him, do it now. How he reacts to your explanation will tell you whether you want to give him even $5,000.

DEAR ABBY: I recently took a job working for someone I knew. He was a neighbor and attended my church for several years, but we were never more than acquaintances.

After I began working there, I saw things going on with other girls in the office that were very inappropriate. Then I stumbled across a sexual online chat he was having with one of them. As I scrolled through the feed, it became apparent they're having an affair. It made me so uncomfortable I quit working there.

We still live in the same community. He has a beautiful, kind and very pregnant wife. Should I tell her? Should I tell anyone, or stay quiet and let him get away with it? It makes me sick, and I don't know what to do at this point. -- UNCOMFORTABLE IN THE WEST

DEAR UNCOMFORTABLE: Allow me to suggest that what you do is remain silent, at least for now. The kind and very pregnant wife does not need to be told that her husband is cheating with an employee at this juncture. After the baby is born, perhaps she should be told -- if she doesn't know already -- but not now.

DEAR ABBY: Please help! How do I politely tell my partner -- without hurting his feelings -- that I don't like his cooking and I should be the one doing the cooking because I'm more "seasoned" in the kitchen than he is? I am usually the "chef" and he is the "second-in-command," which in the past has worked. -- SEASONED IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR SEASONED: Here's how: Skip the part about not liking his cooking, which could be hurtful. Ease into it by telling him you consider cooking together to be a bonding experience. Then say how much you enjoy taking the lead when the two of you do it, how meaningful it is when he helps you, and how much you'd appreciate it if he would continue to let you be the chef.

DEAR ABBY: I'm frustrated that guests in my home almost never use the guest towels I've put out for them in the bathroom. Why do they do this?

I remember a little poem in your column that addresses this. I'd like to clip it and put it in there next to the towels. Please print it again! -- GOOD HOSTESS IN CLOVER, S.C.

DEAR HOSTESS: With pleasure -- here it is:

A GUEST TOWEL SPEAKS

by Mabel Craddock

Please use me, Guest;

Don't hesitate.

Don't turn your back

Or vacillate.

Don't dry your hands

On petticoat,

On handkerchief,

Or redingote.

I'm here to use;

I'm made for drying.

Just hanging here

Gets very tiring.

I thought the poem was clever enough when I first saw it that many of you would enjoy it. After it appeared, many readers thanked me for printing it. Some said they'd framed and hung it in the bathroom their guests used. (Problem solved!) I hear from many readers asking me to re-run articles that hold meaning for them. Some say the articles have been saved until they are yellowed with age and falling apart. Eventually, it was suggested they be put together in a booklet. Since so many readers kept the items to re-read, the booklet is titled "Keepers." It can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus a check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds), to Dear Abby, Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. Filled with clever observations, "Keepers" is both witty and philosophical. It contains poems, essays and letters on subjects as diverse as children, parents, human nature, philosophy and death. It's a quick and easy read as well as an inexpensive gift for newly married couples, pet lovers, new parents, and anyone grieving or recovering from an illness.

DEAR ABBY: Do you think it is right that my parents disowned me because I'm seeing a guy they don't like? I don't think it is. I'm 25, and I live on my own with my son. -- NOT RIGHT IN WASHINGTON

DEAR NOT RIGHT: Not knowing the guy or your parents' reason for disliking him, I can only suggest that their reaction seems extreme. By age 25 you should be mature enough to decide something like this without being emotionally blackmailed. Please recognize that if you give in to this, they will be making your decisions for you until they are no longer on this side of the sod.

DEAR ABBY: I have been trying to get healthy for years and recently lost a lot of weight. Every job I have, I work with grossly obese women. At my present job, one of them keeps coming to work dressed like me. It has happened before and I am sick of it. You have no idea how insulting it is to come to work, ready to do my job and find myself in this embarrassing situation. I just started working here and I need the job.

To me, this is a form of harassment, and I don't understand where she's coming from. It's not my problem if she is unhappy with her self-image. I like myself; I mind my own business and do my work. Also, I worked in fashion for years. If she wants my fashion expertise, she should pay me for it. Copying the way I dress is not a compliment. It's identity theft. She is not me. I do not appreciate her imitating me. Please help! -- ONE OF A KIND IN ILLINOIS

DEAR ONE OF A KIND: I'll try, but it may not be the kind of help you're asking for. Have you never heard the saying, "Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery"? It's a principle the fashion industry is based upon. Instead of being offended and angry, why not help the woman by offering to assist her in making distinctive fashion choices of her own? I'm sure she'd welcome it, and I'm also sure it would lighten and brighten the atmosphere in your workplace.

DEAR ABBY: My mom was involved in a serious car accident a while back that required multiple surgeries and hospital stays. She's still dealing with the repercussions.

The problem is that she doesn't seem to have learned from it. She still texts and looks at her phone while driving. It has reached the point where I refuse to ride with her or allow her to drive my child in her car.

I've asked her repeatedly to not use her phone while driving, but she seems to think she's invincible even after having proof she's not. What should I do to make her understand she's putting herself in danger again, not to mention those who ride with her? -- CONCERNED DAUGHTER

DEAR CONCERNED: Because your mother didn't learn after the accident she caused by not turning off her cellphone, it's time to accept that nothing you say will change her. Continue to refrain from riding with her or allowing your child to. And pray that if she causes another collision, she doesn't kill herself or someone else.

DEAR ABBY: We love to open our windows and enjoy the fresh air during the wintertime in Florida. One neighbor sits out back and smokes and the other one smokes on his front porch, which makes it impossible to open our windows without smoke drifting in. I realize they have rights, but why can't we enjoy our home too? What would you do? -- FRESH AIR IN FLORIDA

DEAR FRESH AIR: I'd consult an air conditioning company and describe the problem. Some restaurants that have smoking patios keep the cigarette smoke from annoying patrons inside by installing a fan above the entrance. The forced air blows straight down and serves as a barrier not only to smoke, but also to flying insects.