DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My wife and I just got married at the end of the summer. Neither of us could take time off for a honeymoon right after the wedding because we used most of our PTO planning and getting to our wedding.

Since we’d lived together for a while before we got married, we didn’t do a big gift registry. Instead, we asked for contributions to a fund for either a honeymoon or a down payment for a house. Many people, especially our close relatives, were very generous, and we now have enough for a dream honeymoon or a nice down payment on a two- or three-bedroom house in an older neighborhood we both like.

The trouble is, she wants to go for the house, and I want to go for the honeymoon. We’re in a large apartment now, and she talks about wanting to not wait too long to start a family, which to me says we should do the kind of travelling now that we won’t be able to do once we have kids.

Which do you think is a better use of the money? --- WANT TO TRAVEL NOW

DEAR WANT TO TRAVEL NOW: You and your bride both have valid points. A good honeymoon will give you memories for a lifetime. A home could be the biggest investment you ever make, and depending on long-range plans, could be the gift that keeps on giving.

Maybe you guys could come to a compromise by earmarking some of the money for a more modest honeymoon and keeping the balance for the house. If the two of you are working, making money, and not outspending your income, you should be able to sock away some of your own money to more easily afford both goals.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I am a grown man and don’t get why my parents are getting so bent out of shape about my New Year’s resolution to give a quarter of what I earn to charity. I told them when I was home for Thanksgiving, and it seems like they should be happy I’m doing something good. But every time I talk to either of them, they start going off on me. What’s their problem? --- WOULD LIKE MY PARENTS TO SUPPORT MY RESOLUTION

DEAR WOULD LIKE MY PARENTS TO SUPPORT MY RESOLUTION: Your generosity is admirable, but only if it doesn’t jeopardize your ability to pay your bills and not starve. It may be these are the kinds of things your parents are concerned about, and unless you’re able to reassure them that you aren’t heading for financial trouble because of your altruism, I can’t say I blame them.

Husband’s Practical Jokes Wear Thin

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I’ve known my husband since high school, even though we didn’t start going together until shortly after we both graduated college. He can be the sweetest, most considerate guy, but he drives me nuts with his not-so-funny practical jokes, especially when one or more of his buddies or his kid brother are around. They don’t do anything that puts anyone in physical danger. It’s more mind games, but I’ve seen people get hurt by them, and then try to laugh it off.

I’ve spoken to my husband and brother-in-law about it, and so long as the friends aren’t around, they’ve been doing better.

Is there any point in me talking to the friends too? --- MARRIED TO A JOKER

DEAR MARRIED TO A JOKER: Many consider practical joking harmless, but there’s always the danger of unintentional damage. However, I don’t believe your speaking to your husband’s friends will do much of anything beyond putting you at risk of becoming more of a target for their humor.

Since you’ve been noticing an improvement with your husband and his brother, maybe it’ll start rubbing off on their friends.