DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Although my mother keeps telling me how blessed we are to have so far stayed safe from COVID, I do not feel particularly blessed. My hours at work are still cut, two of my supervisors tested positive, and one ended up in the hospital. I have had to borrow money from my parents to pay my car insurance and loan payment, and if things do not improve soon, I will be heading back to a basement apartment at my grandmother’s house, not to mention I can not afford to do any Christmas shopping, not even for my family.

With all this going on, I really do not feel like I want to do any holiday decorating, which my mom is getting on me about. She has even offered to come over and help me get my apartment “in the holiday spirit”.

I appreciate my mom’s positivity and all that, but how do I convince her I really am not in a festive mood? --- FEELING THE HUMBUG

DEAR FEELING THE HUMBUG: It isn’t easy for parents to see their kids struggling. Your mom may just be trying to boost your morale by encouraging you to find something like normalcy through holiday traditions.

Ultimately, it’s your place and your decision, and your mother needs to respect your wishes; but it might make you feel a little better to have some holiday cheer on display.

As to your worries about not being able to afford to do Christmas shopping, perhaps you could come up with gifts that don’t cost you anything but a little time, like offering to do something that might give loved ones a break, such as taking on chores or projects they have been wanting to tackle.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My husband and I run an on-line business that personalizes glassware. This is, as you can guess, our busiest time of the year.

We hire extra help from late September through early January. When we bring in the temporary staff, we make it very clear that when you work for us during the holiday season, you are expected to be available at least 40 hours a week, and that those hours can happen evenings and weekends.

This year we have two new kids who work hard when they’re here, but who make snide and snarky comments they think we can’t hear about us. They call us “Grinches” and “Scrooges” and a lot even less flattering names. They also make it clear they feel they’re doing us a favor by doing their jobs. We pay these kids well, better than they would earn working at Target or Walmart, yet they seem so ungrateful.

Do you think we should say something to them, or just let it go and not hire them ever again? --- NOT A SCROOGE

DEAR NOT A SCROOGE: There’s nothing new to the perception that adults over a certain age are hopelessly out of it. Add to that a generation that’s grown up in the age of on-line anonymity and social media-ruled lives, and it’s a small wonder that there are many kids (and adults) who demonstrate a serious lack of commonsense social filters.

What I would do in your situation is to let them know you aren’t so old that you can’t hear them. That may shame them into a little more discretion, but I wouldn’t guarantee it. The one lesson they may learn from — although I doubt they’d ever admit it — is to let them know that because of their attitude, they won’t be welcomed back to work for you and your husband in the future.

Those who can’t learn from their mistakes are bound to repeat them. Hopefully they’ll learn from theirs.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My two sons were raised in the same church I grew up attending. We didn’t make it to service every week when the boys were growing up, but we have always been active, including the boys doing youth group and youth band.

For the last two years, well before the start of COVID, neither boy has set foot in our or any other church, except when they go with me for Easter and Christmas. I didn’t think I raised a couple of “Chreasters”, but that seems to be what has happened, and it bothers me — a lot.

I have spoken to each of them about this, and the answer they both give is that they still believe in God, they just don’t feel they need to sit in a church to prove it. Do you think I would do more damage pushing them to attend, or do I let it drop for now? --- MISS MY SONS AT CHURCH

DEAR MISS MY SONS AT CHURCH: It’s not at all unusual for people to follow a different religious or spiritual path than the one in which they were raised, especially in their young adult years, and I doubt pushing them in a direction they don’t want to go in will do any good.

For now, enjoy their being with you on the occasions they do attend. It seems to me to demonstrate their respect for both you and your devotion to your faith.