DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I got home from work to find my husband super excited because the last of the Halloween trick or treating costumes he ordered came in. It was a special order for our two-year-old son. A few months ago he decided we all have to dress up as Trump, as a joke. We are the least Trump people you can find, but he thinks it will be funny since all the costumes are totally over-the-top ironic.

I think he is wrong, and people will think we are big Trump supporters or possibly worse, that some of his true supporters will get that we’re knocking him and things will get ugly.

We live in a neighborhood with all kinds of political yard signs all over the place, so someone will take our costumes the wrong way.

Why can’t my husband see what a dumb idea this is, no matter how many times I tell him? --- SO STUBBORN

DEAR SO STUBBORN: We’ve had a few trick or treating Trumps in our neighborhood in the past, so I’d bet your family will likely not be the only ones out, especially in an election year. That may be your husband’s thinking as well.

I believe you’re right however, about people having a range of reactions to a family of Donald Trumps walking down their street. But unless you have reason to believe some of your neighbors would get upset enough to pose a real threat, my guess is most people will take it in the light of their choice and simply see a family having fun on a holiday not meant to be taken too seriously.

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DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I grew up in a household where if you did something to upset my mother, she would let you know immediately and clearly. Sometimes she would yell at us, but not only did we usually deserve it, but as soon as she got it off her chest, she moved on, and that made it possible for us to learn from our mistakes and also get over them.

I wish I could say the same was true of my mother-in-law. She imagines she is being polite and tactful, but when she sees something I am doing she does not like, she tells me how she would do it, and then ends with her usual, “But what do I know?” or some similar dig.

How do you deal with someone who is so good at being passive-aggressive while patting herself on the back for showing me how wrong I can be? --- JUST SAY IT

DEAR JUST SAY IT: One thing that might help is when she offers her, “But what do I know?” comments, you can counter with a direct response thanking her for her input and then detailing what you yourself in fact do know about the subject.

Or you can ignore her attempt to challenge you as you proceed as you’d already decided you were going to.

Either way is a declaration of independence that’ll most likely not please your mother-in-law but will hopefully give you the satisfaction of doing things your way, regardless of how she reacts.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When my son got married, his sister was one of the bridesmaids. As a matter of fact, my daughter-in-law asked her before she asked her own two sisters, which I thought was a nice way of showing how important my daughter is to her.

Now that my daughter is engaged, she has told me she is only having her best friends as her bridesmaids. When I said she should ask her sister-in-law also, she said she has no obligation to include her in the party, especially since she is having our granddaughter, her niece, as the flower girl. She thinks that is enough and that I am being dumb thinking my daughter-in-law will care because making their daughter her flower girl is her way of including her brother’s family in the wedding party.

My daughter-in-law is a very sweet, sensitive, and generous person. I cannot imagine she will not be stung by being left out of my daughter’s wedding party.

Do you think this was the right thing for my daughter to do? --- NOT PLEASED

DEAR NOT PLEASED: Although it’s common practice, it isn’t by any means a rule that brides have to ask those whose wedding parties they’ve been in to be part of their own.

It’s your daughter’s wedding, and who she chooses as her attendants is ultimately her choice.

While you may be surprised and disappointed by your daughter-in-law’s exclusion, I agree that by having her niece as the flower girl, your daughter’s at least apparently honoring her brother’s and sister-in-law’s close connection.