DEAR ABBY: I have been married to "Roman" for 13 years. He has always been a man of few words who didn't initiate much on his own, so I stepped up to bat and did everything. I took over all aspects of our married life -- from bill paying to home maintenance to romance. He would tell me how grateful he was to me for doing it.

His adult daughters from a previous marriage have always been cold to me, and I recently found out why. It turns out Roman made up horrible, untrue stories behind my back. He painted himself as the victim of abuse! His daughters staged an "intervention" to save their dad, and Roman went along with them. He cleared out our bank accounts, hid money and assets and filed for divorce. I was stunned.

Abby, he went along with the charade for a week -- until his guilt got the better of him, and he admitted he had made it all up. He claims he doesn't want to divorce me after all. He said he made up the stories to get his daughters' attention.

Roman and I are now going through counseling, and I am assuming responsibility for my part in this mess. He harbors strong resentment toward me and resorted to passive-aggressive revenge. We're both doing our best to establish forthright, honest and open lines of communication.

The problem is his daughters still believe the lies. They hate me and won't speak to their father unless he divorces me. I'm not sure what to do. Roman has lost his family and he may lose me, too. The damage is so widespread I don't know what can be regained. Have you any advice for me? -- OLDER, WISER AND HEARTBROKEN

DEAR OLDER, WISER AND HEARTBROKEN: Your letter made me furious. It proves that with your husband no good deed goes unpunished. Had you not taken on the functions your husband avoided, your credit would be shot, your house would be a wreck and your sex life nonexistent. And for this your husband slandered you?

That he would lie to his daughters about you is disgusting. That he then made a money grab and hid assets is appalling. What have you to gain from continuing this marriage? If I were you, I'd contact a divorce lawyer and a forensic accountant, divide the assets and let the daughters take care of their ingrate of a father.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I belong to a supper club comprised of four couples. We have enjoyed our monthly gatherings for years and have developed a strong bond with each couple. As a rule, each one takes turns hosting the event in their home. The recent behavior of one hostess has us baffled.

For starters, "Lynn" sometimes seats herself and her husband at a separate table, even though there's room at the main table. She also involves herself with activities I consider rude -- taking calls on her cell, perusing Facebook, doing paperwork. It's beginning to feel as though we are an obligation rather than wanted guests.

Members of our group have been hesitant to discuss this with her because we don't want to create tension in the group we have come to hold dear. Any suggestions? -- GETTING SERVED A COLD DISH

DEAR GETTING SERVED: It appears there is already tension in the group you have come to hold dear. For a host to behave the way Lynn has is rude. Whoever in the group is closest to Lynn should have a chat with her about it -- preferably face-to-face -- and ask her to explain. It's possible that the responsibility of hosting has become too much for her.

DEAR ABBY: My otherwise loving, honest, generous, kind and attentive husband of 10 years feels it's his right to walk into the bathroom whenever he wants, even when I'm in there. He says it's coincidence, but I think he does it intentionally. We don't have locks -- or even doors -- to shut our master bathroom. We do have other bathrooms in the house.

I have asked him repeatedly not to come in or to make some noise so I know he's coming. He says he "forgets." If I'm in the shower or bent over with my head upside down blow-drying my hair and turn around or look up and see another person, I get startled. My adrenaline pumps and I end up yelling at him.

I'd prefer to get clean and pretty in peace. My husband thinks I'm overreacting. Am I? -- BOTHERED IN THE BATHROOM

DEAR BOTHERED: Feeling as strongly as you do, it's surprising that you would move into a house in which the master bedroom and bath are set up this way. And yes, I do think you're overreacting.

However, you have a couple of options: The first would be for you to get clean and pretty in one of the other bathrooms. The second would be to start a remodeling project and have a door (or doors) to your master bath installed so your husband can knock before entering.

DEAR ABBY: I am married to a wonderful and unique man. Despite his privileged upbringing he is very down-to-earth. His parents' affluence afforded him many opportunities and still does. Unfortunately, my in-laws are snobbish, self-absorbed and competitive. They are critical of everyone -- especially their grown son. They put him and each other down constantly. They cause scenes and can't enjoy life.

My husband is trying to be patient because he knows his parents aren't going to change at their age. But they consume so much of our energy with their constant dramatic highs and lows. Any advice for dealing with drama queens (and kings)? They do love us and can be considerate. -- LIVING IN THE REAL WORLD IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR REAL: It may help you and your husband to understand that people who act the way your in-laws do are usually insecure on some basic level. They put others down to inflate their egos and reassure themselves that they're "OK" by magnifying (or inventing) flaws in others. When your in-laws start to criticize, be pleasant and make a point of saying something positive about their target. It will short-circuit the rant.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 40-year-old working mother raising a daughter who is the joy of my life. Once in a great while I'll accept an invitation to go on a date and hire a baby sitter to watch my daughter.

My question is, who should pay for the sitter? The man who asked me out or should I? I have yet to have a suitor offer to pay. Is that just the way it is, or are these men just cheap? -- MOM ON A BUDGET

DEAR MOM: Paying for your daughter's sitter is your responsibility. When you become involved in a steady relationship and the cost of a sitter becomes a financial burden, discuss it then with your boyfriend, who should be willing to share some of the cost.

DEAR ABBY: I dated a guy named "Jake" for two years. He was my first love and he meant everything to me. Well, things happened and he broke my heart.

After a year of not really talking, Jake is now texting and calling to convince me to be his "friend with benefits." He tries to sweet-talk me by calling me pet names. Of course, I say no over and over each time he asks on the phone. But the minute we come face-to-face or hang out, I just give in.

There will always be a soft spot for Jake in my heart, and I don't know what to do. I want to stay friends because he's important to me, but I don't want to be his FWB. It brings back painful memories.

How do I say no? Am I overreacting? Should I go with the flow because it's not a big deal? I feel like I'm in a script for a bad movie. -- WANTS TO MOVE ON IN HOUSTON

DEAR WANTS TO MOVE ON: Your ex-boyfriend appears to be a super salesman. The best way not to buy what he's selling is not to listen to his pitch. The sooner you accept you can't be "friends" because you lose control whenever you see him, the sooner you'll be able to write a happy ending to this drama. As long as you sleep with Jake you will not be able to replace him with someone who can give you what you want and deserve, which is a real relationship.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of three years, "Patrick," is smart, successful and wonderful in every way. He dresses extremely well with attention to detail. Many of his friends call him a "metrosexual."

Patrick never had braces as a child. Now, as an adult, his teeth have caved in and are very unattractive. It surprises me that he would let his teeth go or hasn't noticed how crooked and deformed they are. I'm afraid to mention it in case it would hurt his feelings. As we are thinking about marriage, the prospect of having to look at Patrick's bad teeth, that will likely worsen with age, is a deterrent.

Am I being petty and superficial or should I suggest adult braces? Patrick can more than afford them and isn't afraid of pain or going to the doctor. My own lower teeth could use some work, so maybe I could suggest we both get braces. I'm not sure what to do. -- BRACING FOR AN ANSWER IN BOULDER

DEAR BRACING: By all means talk to your boyfriend about the condition of his mouth as well as good dental health. If his teeth are as crooked as you have described, his bite is probably also off -- which can cause jaw problems when he's older. Your idea of getting braces with him is a good one, and I agree it's worth pursuing because you won't appear to be criticizing him. I hope he heeds your suggestion.

DEAR ABBY: My landlord likes to wander around the yard and driveway wearing only a towel around his waist. Sometimes he goes out of his way to talk with me while "dressed" that way. Should I be concerned? -- CALIFORNIA RENTER

DEAR RENTER: Probably not, unless his towel "slips," or California experiences more gale-force winds such as the ones that occurred last December.