DEAR ABBY: My daughter-in-law had an affair with a co-worker and is now pregnant by him. She swears she loves my son and won't leave him, but insists that her lover be a part of the baby's life. My son is torn. They have two small children and he doesn't want to break up the family. How can he continue to trust her?

My husband refuses to have her in our house. She can be vindictive to those she feels have "wronged" her, and I'm afraid she'll keep us from the grandchildren. My son used to go to church before she came along, but they no longer go. We sought legal advice for him and he knows the score in that regard. Abby, how can we make him see this woman is no good for him? -- HEAVY-HEARTED MOTHER IN GEORGIA

DEAR MOTHER: If I were you, I'd stop trying. Your son has made his choice, which is to keep his family together. If that means accepting that his wife will maintain a relationship with her lover and, in essence, her baby will have "two daddies," that's the way it's going to be. While I understand your husband's anger, as long as your son is willing to tolerate the situation, there is nothing to be gained by banning your daughter-in-law from the premises.

Because you mentioned church, pray for the strength to support your son through this because he's going to need it. I'm sure he is fully aware that his wife isn't "good" for him, but he's trying to take the high road anyway. So try to be supportive.

DEAR ABBY: I met a woman who seems to be everything I have been looking for. We have similar interests and share many of the same goals.

My problem is I'm only 5 foot 9 and she's 6 feet tall. Am I foolish for feeling like less of a man when in her company? What will people think? -- NOT SO TALL IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR NOT SO TALL: If you would allow a 3-inch difference in height to keep you from pursuing a woman who "seems to be everything you're looking for," then you are foolish.

Being taller than a woman doesn't make a man more manly. What makes a man manly is his level of self-confidence, which you appear to lack. Until you understand and accept that what other people think is their problem, I'm not sure you'll find the happiness you're looking for.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 15-year-old girl who's involved with social media. My parents have always been protective. A few days ago they asked me for the passwords to my Twitter, Facebook and email accounts. I understand they're trying to protect me, but the fact that they don't trust me by now is upsetting.

I tried telling them this, and they say they do trust me, but they still want my passwords. Is this a contradiction? I need some independence, and they don't seem to understand that. -- LOSING MY MIND IN TACOMA, WASH.

DEAR LOSING YOUR MIND: It's not a contradiction if you read some of the news coverage on the Internet about young people who have committed suicide because they were hounded by cyber-bullies. It's not a contradiction if you consider that sometimes bad things happen at parties that aren't properly supervised. If, God forbid, you should "disappear," your parents -- and the police -- would want to know who had been communicating with you and what was said.

Please do not overreact to their concern. While it would have been better if they had given you a reason for their request, I doubt they'll be reading over your shoulder. Most parents don't spend a lot of time doing that unless they have some reason to mistrust their teenager.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I go out to dinner once a month with a couple we have known for years. "Joe" is an active conversationalist, while my husband is fairly quiet.

The problem is Joe addresses only me and stares at me throughout the meal. I think it's just a bad habit he has acquired. To no avail I have tried various seating arrangements to avoid the constant stare. It makes me very uncomfortable. I feel bad for my husband, who is totally ignored, but doesn't seem to care as long as the food is good!

How do I get Joe to include my husband in the conversation and rest his gaze elsewhere? I would never say anything to "Mrs. Joe" about it because I don't want to make her uncomfortable, too. I really want to continue the friendship and the socializing, but I'd like to feel more relaxed at the dinner table. Any suggestions? -- DISTRESSED DINER

DEAR DISTRESSED: You are not helpless. The next time Joe directs his comments and questions only to you, toss the verbal ball to your husband and say, "Honey, what do you think about that?" It will give him an opening to enter the conversation.

As for the staring, Joe may not be aware of what he's doing. You could bring it to his attention by simply saying: "You keep looking at me, Joe. Do I have food in my teeth? Is my lipstick smeared?" Then haul out a compact and make a show of checking for yourself. It may help to curb his discomfiting habit.

DEAR ABBY: I'm single and have grown children. I know I am not going to live forever, and I want to make sure I am not a burden to them even after death. I have a will and no bills beyond my house and normal living expenses. What else do I need to do to make sure everything is taken care of when I'm gone? -- PREPARING IN ADVANCE

DEAR PREPARING: Do you have an advance directive for health care in case you become so ill before your death that you can't speak for yourself? Do you have at least one health care advocate who will ensure your wishes are carried out? Do you have a cemetery plot selected and paid for, so your children won't have to do it? How about money set aside for your funeral or memorial?

If the answer to each of these questions is yes, all you need to do is make certain your children are aware of it. If not, then get busy!

DEAR ABBY: I'm 14 and in the eighth grade. Some of my friends have problems with body odor. It makes it hard for me to be around them. They are all nice people, but sometimes I can't breathe when I'm near them.

Some of my other friends say I should tell them, but I'm not sure how without hurting their feelings. The odor ranges from breath to body. Abby, they are known throughout our school for being "the smelly ones." How do I tell them without offending them? -- BREATHLESS IN BEACHWOOD, OHIO

DEAR BREATHLESS: I agree that telling people they have bad breath or body odor can be embarrassing. But to do so is not hurtful; in fact, it is doing the person a huge favor. The way to do it is privately. This is important because your friends are probably not aware that they have a problem or have been causing one.

DEAR ABBY: My son and his wife, "Carole," have been married for two years. I was recently introduced to her father, "Ted," who has been alone for 13 years. Carole told me later in no uncertain terms that I cannot have a romantic relationship with her father. Then she repeated the same thing to him.

Do you think it's right for adult children to dictate to their parents who they can and cannot see? Ted and I are perplexed. We really like each other and would like to see where this relationship could go. We laugh easily together, cook in the kitchen well together, can talk for hours and generally are very compatible. We have both discussed our pasts and have been honest with each other. What's your opinion? -- DESERVES TO BE HAPPY IN FLORIDA

DEAR DESERVES: Before the relationship goes further, you and Ted should step back and ask yourselves what might happen if this romance doesn't work out. Would the hurt feelings disrupt the family dynamic? If this can be handled thoughtfully, with grace and maturity, I agree that you deserve to be happy. While adult offspring may try to dictate what their parents can and cannot do, as mature adults, you do not have to blindly accept it.

DEAR ABBY: I have been friends with "Kurt" for many years. We met during Little League, and as we got older we stood up in each other's wedding. He was my best man.

Kurt's marriage is in trouble because he has a gambling problem. I feel guilty because I never said anything to him about it when we were together at the casino and he was spending more money than he could afford. I was with him only a handful of times, but I still think I should have spoken up.

Should I have? Or wouldn't it have mattered if I did? Kurt is going to Gamblers Anonymous meetings now, trying to save his marriage. -- GUILTY IN WISCONSIN

DEAR GUILTY: You could have said something to your friend, but the question is, would Kurt have listened and accepted what you were trying to convey? People who have addictions are usually in denial until they have no other choice but to face it.

Your feeling guilty won't help this situation. Being supportive of your longtime friend and making sure that when you're together there is no wagering happening (i.e., on sporting events) would be helpful. The rest is up to him.

DEAR ABBY: I recently ended a two-year relationship with my boyfriend. We are both 20. He was a great boyfriend -- always patient, kind, gentle and loving. However, I was often impatient, short-tempered and controlling. These issues were my personal problems. I always tried to work on them, but although it got better, I knew I wasn't treating him the way I should. I ended things with him because I felt guilty.

It has been a month now, and I'm having second thoughts about having ended it with an almost-perfect person. I miss him. Would it be unwise to reach out to him again? -- BROKEN UP BUT NOT OVER IT

DEAR NOT OVER IT: Not necessarily. But before you do, allow yourself a period of introspection during which you focus less on your missing him and concentrate on why you were abusive to him. A man with his qualities deserves to be treated with more respect than you showed him. The truism, "If you don't value what you've got, you will lose it," applies to relationships.