DEAR ABBY: Back in 2013, a co-worker, "Jamie," and I fell in love. Both of us were married to other people, but everything felt perfect. It was a feeling I never had for anyone in my life before. Three years later, I lost my job. The day I was terminated, my wife found out I had been cheating, so I ended the affair.

I have found full-time work and I'm still married, but I'm not in love with my wife like I am with Jamie. I have tried to stay in contact with her to prove to her that I'm a better man, with little success. She told me I was her only love, but I broke her heart.

She doesn't want to see me, even after several years of my trying to prove that I am the man she fell in love with. Her husband doesn't know anything. She's afraid I may break it off again. Should I continue pursuing her or give up and move on? I thought I could handle it on my own, but I need some advice. -- MISSING HER IN ONTARIO, CANADA

DEAR MISSING HER: If you and Jamie really loved each other, you would no longer be married to your spouses. Having been dumped by you once, your former lover has a point. Give up and move on and you will save yourself, your wife, Jamie and her husband a lot of pain.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a pediatric RN at a large hospital. Sadly, I have seen too many young children die. I have learned to keep a professional distance, so that I can take care of the children and their families. I never give out my phone number, social media or email address, and I try not to let the parents ever see my struggle. But every once and a while, I can't help caring beyond "professional."

We just lost a beautiful little one who had spent a year and a half receiving care off and on in the hospital, and I'm heartbroken. The family has asked for nurses and doctors to attend the funeral, and I really want to. But how do I explain why I go to some funerals and not others? -- HEARTBROKEN ONCE AGAIN

DEAR HEARTBROKEN: You don't have to explain. I can't imagine anyone actually counting the number of funerals/memorials you attend and asking a question like that. However, if anyone should, say that you can't attend them all because the loss of these little angels takes such a heavy toll on your heart. It's the truth.

DEAR ABBY: My late wife passed away two years ago. We always had a dog in our house. He died a year ago. I now have a new lady love in my life, but she doesn't want a pet in her house. I'm dying to have another dog, and I don't know what to do. Please advise. -- PETLESS IN TEXAS

DEAR PETLESS: Eligible widowers are a prized commodity. If your idea of happiness is having a house dog, find yourself a lady who loves animals as you do. It shouldn't be difficult.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 22, and my boyfriend wants sex, but I absolutely do not. I don't feel sexual desire -- not at all. I'm asexual, but he refuses to believe me and insists my "past relations have scarred me" and that I "need to get over it."

When I was 17, I was raped by my ex-boyfriend, and I admit it traumatized me. But that isn't what my problem is. I honestly don't feel any need for sex. I never have.

This has become a serious problem for us because my boyfriend keeps pushing for it. Last year, we had sex on his birthday, but I froze up. I couldn't make myself refuse -- just as I didn't consent -- but he doesn't seem to understand that.

His birthday is coming up soon and he wants to have sex again, but like I've said, I don't. What am I supposed to do? I can't force myself to feel lust. It isn't there. Please help me. -- NO DESIRE IN THE SOUTH

DEAR NO DESIRE: Whether your lack of desire is related to the rape or you are naturally asexual is something no one can answer without a mental health professional seeing and evaluating you. However, I can unequivocally say this: If you don't want to have sex, pay attention to your feelings and don't do it.

There has been some conjecture that because we live in such an oversexualized society that some individuals have become desensitized to it. However, because of your sexual history, it might benefit you to find a rape counseling center and talk to a counselor to ensure that the sexual assault didn't cause or contribute to this.

DEAR ABBY: After dating a guy I'll call Charlie for two years, I broke up with him. It was the biggest mistake I've ever made. I know I can't change anything, but now we have started talking again, and Charlie told me he had planned to propose to me the day I dumped him.

We have been discussing starting over again together. He's about to go across the country for college, and he asked me to move with him. Of course I said yes! It would be a perfect way to start fresh.

When I asked Charlie when we'd make us official, he said he has to focus on college first. I don't want to wait two to four years to begin our lives. Why would he want me to move with him and hold off being official if we're going to be together in the end? And what's the difference between being his fiancee moving with him and being a "friend" moving with him? I'm really upset, and I don't want to lose him again. -- STARTING OVER IN THE EAST

DEAR STARTING OVER: The difference between being a girlfriend who goes with him to college and being Charlie's fiancee is night and day. What do you plan to do when you get there? Get a job? Go to college, too? Who is going to support you financially on this adventure?

As a girlfriend, you will have far less status than if you were engaged. If he met someone else, you could be discarded like a gum wrapper along the highway of life. Please talk to your parents or some other adult relatives about this. As Charlie has made clear, he isn't ready for marriage -- or even a committed relationship. You may not want to lose him, but the surest way to do that would be to do what you are planning.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 35-year-old gay man who has been in a serious relationship for five years. During the last year, my significant other, "Grady," has grown very close with a female co-worker of mine he met at my office party. (I'll call her Tina.) They have become inseparable, and when they aren't hanging out, he's constantly texting and calling her.

At first I didn't have a problem with it, but lately I'm getting some strange vibes. Grady always said he was never attracted to women, but I have caught him ogling Tina when she's at our pool in her bikini. He acts like a jealous boyfriend when men approach her and even ran off a couple she briefly dated.

Yesterday there was a fire in the building where I work, and everyone was forced to evacuate. Last night I discovered that when Grady heard it on the radio, he left his job to come and get Tina and drive her home. Not once did he attempt to contact me to see how I was doing.

When I confronted him, he argued that Tina doesn't have a car (which is true), and said he was worried because she's "just a kid." But, Abby, she's not a kid. Tina is 25 years old and capable of calling a taxi or asking for a ride. I told him that rather than leave work, he could have called me and asked me to drive her home. Later he admitted that she hadn't tried to contact him -- that his worry drove him to come and get her, which indicates to me that something more is going on.

Am I overreacting like he says, or should I be worried I'm about to lose my man? -- JEALOUS IN TEXAS

DEAR JEALOUS: Grady does seem fixated on Tina. I have heard of straight men repressing their homosexual feelings until they are middle-aged, so I suppose it's possible for a gay man to discover that he's bisexual. That said, I'm not sure you are overreacting. Whether Tina is a threat to your relationship only he can answer.

If Grady is willing to go with you, relationship counseling should be available at your nearest gay and lesbian community center. I suggest this because the two of you may need an unbiased referee to prevent an honest conversation about your feelings from degenerating into an argument.

DEAR ABBY: My in-laws (whom I love) stay with us twice a year and we entertain them while they're here. Whenever they are in town, my husband's ex-wife insists on meeting them for lunch.

It has been 10 years since my husband and his ex were divorced. They have adult children. Her inclusion hurts my feelings, and I suspect my in-laws are just afraid of hurting the ex's feelings. She is remarried, too. How would you feel? -- TIRED OF IT IN TENNESSEE

DEAR TIRED: I would feel less threatened than you apparently do, and this is how I would handle it: I'd keep the visit positive, and realize the ex is ancient history. I would not let her presence ruin the visit. Your in-laws are adults. If they didn't want to see her, they would find a way to tell her that they couldn't fit her in. If necessary, I would also remind myself that their having lunch with her has nothing to do with the relationship they have with me, which is what I recommend you do.