DEAR HARRIETTE: This summer, my husband and I went overboard on spending money. Between vacations, summer camps and overzealous back-to-school shopping, we have found ourselves pretty low in the barrel. Our children have been asking for new clothes and toys, and we are unable to deliver. We are focusing on keeping food on the table, the mortgage paid and saving again. How can I talk to my kids about having less money to spend in terms they can understand? They are elementary- and middle-school-aged, and they seem to think we have a huge surplus of income. -- Scraping By, Jackson, Mississippi

DEAR SCRAPING BY: Financial adviser and author of "Do I Look Like an ATM?" Sabrina Lamb thinks it's important for parents to reveal to their children what the family household income and expenses are. She says that if you are not honest and open with your children, they will not understand what the family's financial reality is. I like the idea that you should show your children the family budget so that they can see in black and white how much money is coming in and how much is going out.

Your family may want to include a summer budget in your discussion so that everyone can see that you spent too much during the warm months and have to streamline now to recoup. If your kids see it plain as day, it will be harder for them to try to make demands that you cannot fulfill. Just remind your children that whatever you share about your financials is confidential, and you expect them to keep the family finances to themselves.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a model during my gap year from high school to college. This is something I always wanted to do, so I was ecstatic when I was signed with a few agencies around the world. Now that I am in the modeling world, I find myself jealous of other models and their careers. I beat myself up over not doing as well as them. I know we have different measurements and faces, but I constantly find myself comparing my career with other models who are more successful and younger than me. It seems impossible for me to keep my head down and focus on myself. -- Strut, Pittsburgh

DEAR STRUT: The modeling business is one of the most difficult industries. The people who fill the role are hired in large part on completely subjective reasons. Specific aspects of how they look guide the hiring practices of model bookers. These are the facts. With this in mind, you have to understand that your unique attributes are the things that will attract the attention of those who hire models.

In addition, your hard work at keeping your skin clear, keeping your body trim and fit (even if you are a full-figured model) and your ability to move with grace and confidence will help to give you an edge. One other factor is that just like any other career, you have to give yourself fully to it in order to become successful. A one-year commitment may not be enough to build momentum. Give it your absolute all so that you can find out. Be positive!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I love going off the grid. I feel like we are so constantly accessible that it makes me feel free when I don't have a phone on me. I don't do this for days at a time, just 12-hour blocks. It makes me feel completely refreshed. My friends and family get surprisingly mad about texts and calls going unanswered. I am never in danger, and I have the right to my privacy. When I tell them that I just want to be alone, they claim I am being selfish and should at least give them the courtesy of responding. Am I being rude by taking time to myself? -- All Alone, Shreveport, Louisiana

DEAR ALL ALONE: I love that you are not bound by technology. What you must do is train your loved ones to expect you to be disconnected for blocks of time. Promise that you will contact them if you are ever in trouble. Recommend that they try your version of being unplugged.

Interestingly, people who are always connecting to others via phone, text and various forms of social media often feel isolated and lonely. It seems like a contradiction, but this may be because the depth of connection is superficial at best. If you are currently cultivating meaningful relationships with others, you may want to point that out to your loved ones. Don't forget to note the relationship with yourself that you get to grow because you are blocking out a lot of noise.

DEAR HARRIETTE: After a summer of working, I am back at my university for another year of learning. I signed myself up for six classes, plus I work part time. This is in addition to clubs and organizations. Last year, my routine was quickly established, and I would already have all of my ducks in a row, so to speak. This year has me overwhelmed and unable to fall into a steady routine. I don't think too much has changed since last year, and I am just trying to get my motivation and routine back in order. How can I take the first proactive step? -- Waves of Work, Atlanta

DEAR WAVES OF WORK: You sound efficient and well-organized, both excellent traits. You must also leave space for fluidity and change. Every year at university can become exponentially more complicated and challenging. That is part of the nature of higher learning. You cannot predict how everything is going to work out, nor how smoothly you will transition into the semester.

Your first proactive step may just be to accept that this semester is different from the last. Give yourself permission to pay close attention to what classes need more time and focus. Creating a schedule based on what you learn will help you to complete your work effectively.

While it sounds like you are busy at school, it would be great if you could carve out time on a daily basis that is unplanned. When can you do whatever you want -- or nothing -- in the day? Amid classes, clubs, organizations and work, you seem pretty overloaded. Establishing a healthy rhythm should include some time for you, even if it is only a few minutes each day.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My brother and I lost touch for more than six months. We had always been inseparable siblings, but a few little arguments led to ignored calls. I called him a few days ago and left a voicemail, saying our late father would be disappointed in how we were acting. That finally got a reaction from him. However, instead of seeing that family should come first, he berated me for bringing our father into our argument.

I want my brother to stop being angry and to realize blood is thicker than water. I won't apologize for mentioning our father, especially since what I said was true. -- Sibling Spat, Cambridge, Massachusetts

DEAR SIBLING SPAT: Your brother is right. Bringing your late father into your standoff probably felt like you trying to guilt him into talking to you again. That was not a good strategic move. I recommend that you apologize, especially if your goal is to get to some meaningful moment of reconnection.

Reach out to your brother and let him know how much you miss him and regret that anything has come between you. Tell him that you mentioned your late father because you were hoping his memory might invoke good feelings. You are sorry that it did not. Tell him you want to revive your relationship and ask what he thinks you can do to that end.

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my closest friends from college and I are finally working in the same city. We had spoken about getting an apartment together, so I went to work finding a place for us right away. I told her today that I found the perfect place for us, and she told me that she already found a house with friends in the suburbs and would be commuting to work. I was furious. I purposely didn't renew my lease because I thought I was moving. Now I'm stuck in the mud and mad at my friend. Is there any way we could fix this relationship? I have no idea where I can go now, and I'm getting kicked out in a month. -- Flaky Friend, Syracuse, New York

DEAR FLAKY FRIEND: I wonder about the conversation you had about getting an apartment together. How serious was it? When did it occur? Did you follow up with your friend as you looked for a new space? If you honestly believe that your friend led you on and then just dropped you, that's one type of reality regarding friend dynamics. But I sincerely question whether you made some assumptions without following up with your friend. To decide to move in together and identify an apartment, go through a credit check, make a down payment -- all of that should require active engagement on both of your parts. If that did not happen, it could be that your friend thought she was just shooting the breeze with an old college buddy rather than making a real plan.

Your first responsibility now is to find another apartment. After that, double back to your friend and talk through what happened. Let her know that you feel betrayed, and see where she stands.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)