DEAR HARRIETTE: I just dropped my daughter off at college last week, and she’s already asking me to come back and pick her up. She’s saying that college isn’t for her, but she hasn’t even started classes yet. This has been an emotional time for both of us as I am a single mom and she is my only daughter. She’s always been introverted and has struggled with making friends, so I knew the transition to college life would be challenging for her. She’s been texting and calling me constantly, saying she feels overwhelmed, lonely and completely out of place. Part of me wants to rush over there, bring her home and make everything better, but I also know that she needs to figure out this new chapter in her life. How can I best support my daughter during this tough time? What should I say or do to help her feel more comfortable and give college a fair chance? -- Separation Anxiety

DEAR SEPARATION ANXIETY: Your job as a mother is to teach your child how to be independent and take care of herself. This is a tough moment, but it is essential for your daughter to learn how to be away from you and still thrive. Unless you fear that she is unsafe, stand your ground and cheer for her from a distance. Assure her that this difficult moment will pass. Encourage her to lean into her studies and find extracurricular activities to occupy the rest of her time. She can consider student government, arts or science clubs, or even getting an on-campus job. She should find things to do that put her in the company of other students so that she is forced to interact with them. Over time, she will meet people who share her interests, but it won’t happen if you allow her to flee school and come home to Mommy.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend’s parents and I used to be on very good terms; I often spent the weekends at their house. However, the situation changed when my boyfriend’s mother, “Marie,” read a conversation between his brother’s girlfriend, “Lisa,” and me. My boyfriend’s brother, “Nick,” has three sons with Lisa, but he contributes little financially and spends all his money on alcohol. After their last big fight, which led to their breakup, Lisa confided in me. I advised her to take Nick to family court to seek child support. Somehow, Marie got ahold of a screenshot of our conversation. She then proceeded to message me, calling me names such as traitor and ungrateful, and said I am no longer welcome at their home. I feel extremely sad about the whole situation and want to mend things. Is there anything I can do to resolve this? -- Family Situation

DEAR FAMILY SITUATION: While it is unfortunate that Marie saw your text, you didn’t say the wrong thing -- her son should step up and accept responsibility for his family. Perhaps the whole family needs a wake-up call. It is not OK for alcohol or any other distractions to prevent him from supporting his children.

You can apologize to Marie for hurting her feelings as you also point out that there is a crisis occurring in the family that needs to be addressed. You may lose your relationship if your boyfriend doesn’t stand beside you on this, but you will have stood up for what’s right.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a falling out with a friend recently, and I’m not sure if I want to continue the relationship at all. She is probably a certifiable narcissist. Everything revolves around her. She needs to be the center of attention -- always. She revels in making quips about everyone and everything, and her comments are often biting.

I know this about her, but she crossed the line when she started talking about my son. I believe our families and certainly our children should be off-limits when it comes to making jokes at others’ expense. When I challenged her on this, she doubled down, saying that what she had said about my son was true, so what’s the big deal, even though it was unkind. Maybe I am being petty. Maybe I am crazy to be friends with this woman at all. I am a positive person, and she is very negative, though she doesn’t think that about herself.

I know I cannot change people, but I don’t appreciate someone bad-mouthing my child. Should I cut her off? When I spoke to her about it, she brushed it off and took no real responsibility for her words. -- Drawing the Line

DEAR DRAWING THE LINE: You have to decide how much is too much and what you are going to do about it. You already knew what this woman was like based on how she talked about other people. It was only a matter of time before her vitriol would be pointed at you and yours. If that was the last straw for you, so be it. You probably don’t need to tell her. You can just stop inviting her to spend time with you, stop accepting her invitations to hang out and limit your exposure to her. Why do I say that? If she doesn’t understand that insulting your son was taking her comments too far, chances are, she won’t have a sense of why you would cut her off. Don’t waste your breath; just change your actions.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been asked to co-author a book with a colleague for a company project, which is super exciting but also nerve-wracking because we have totally different writing styles and creative visions. I really want this collaboration to work out, but I'm feeling a bit anxious about how we can merge our ideas in a way that respects each other's contributions and keeps the partnership productive. Do you have any advice on how to work this out and make sure we create something awesome together? I'd appreciate any insights you have on this! -- Co-Author Collaboration

DEAR CO–AUTHOR COLLABORATION: Sometimes collaborating writers take on different chapters so that their contributions do not have to turn into one singular voice. You may consider that as a practical option. Still, you will have to come to terms on the structure and focus of the book together. You may want to invite a member of your team to serve as an editor -- or referee -- to help you establish an outline and help decide who does what.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a husband seeking advice. My wife has been engaging in a practice she calls "fridgescaping," which is currently a viral trend on TikTok, where she decorates the inside of our fridge with vases and flowers to make it look pretty. While I appreciate her creativity, I find it to be overly extravagant and inconvenient as I often have to move things around to access items. When I mentioned my concerns, she immediately removed everything without discussion. Since then, she has been distant and uncommunicative. How can I address this issue with her when she’s closing her communication and giving me the cold shoulder? I did not realize this would be such a big issue. -- Fridgescaping

DEAR FRIDGESCAPING: Clearly you hurt your wife’s feelings, even though it wasn’t intentional. She found some joy in participating in this trend, and you brought in a practical concern that probably felt like having cold water thrown in her face.

Tell your wife you want to talk to her. Apologize for hurting her feelings. Share that you didn’t realize how much it would bother her for you to say something about her current focus on decorating the refrigerator. Of course you want her to be happy. Perhaps there is a compromise that you can reach so that she can continue to decorate and you can still find things. Make sure she knows your intention was not to make her feel bad -- you just wanted to be able to locate something you wanted to eat.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm 20 and currently dating someone who is significantly older than me -- by 16 years. While we have a strong connection, we face challenges due to our age gap. My partner's parents, who are more traditional, have made it clear through their disapproving glances and subtle comments that they are not fond of our relationship. I want to make a good impression and have a positive relationship with them. How can I build a better connection with them? Any advice on how to win them over would be greatly appreciated. -- Age Gap

DEAR AGE GAP: As the mother of a 20-year-old daughter, I have to say I totally understand the concerns that your partner’s parents (and probably others) have about your relationship. I also get that you feel like you have met someone who may be your partner and want to explore that. My best advice is to slow down. A lasting relationship is built on shared interests, intellectual connection, compatible values, intertwined goals, mutual respect and physical attraction. Pay attention to which of these things you share. How novel is the relationship versus how lasting? What do you want from this relationship?

I know that 20-year-olds can be mature, but through your eyes today, what do you want for your life and how might your partner fit into your vision? What does he want? Your partner’s parents' opinion of your relationship may soften over time if you two demonstrate that your commitment is real and can stand the test of time. Be patient and pay attention.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)