DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m in a difficult situation with one of my friends, and I don’t know how to handle it. Recently, they cheated on a school exam and got caught. To my surprise, my friend is now accusing me of being involved even though I worked hard and studied diligently for the test. I’ve always prided myself on putting in the effort, staying up late and doing everything I can to achieve good results honestly. But now, because of my friend’s actions, I’m being dragged into a situation I had no part in.

It hurts that my hard work and dedication are being questioned, and even worse, that my friend is trying to shift the blame onto me. I’ve tried to stand my ground and make it clear that I had nothing to do with their cheating, but I’m still feeling the weight of their accusation. I’ve always valued honesty, and it’s frustrating to be linked to something that goes against everything I believe in. -- False Accusations

DEAR FALSE ACCUSATIONS: To clear your name, go to the school authorities and plead your case. Be detailed in describing how you approached the exam. Offer to take it again or to take another exam to prove your knowledge. Admit that the person in question is your friend, but stand fast in declaring that you did not have any knowledge of their cheating. Assure the school leadership that you had nothing to do with this, nor are you comfortable with it now.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve always believed in working hard, pouring my energy into providing for my family. I’ve been married for five years, and my wife and I have two children. She stays at home now and cares for them full time. Every day, I push myself, juggling responsibilities and giving my all so that they have everything they need. I’m the breadwinner, and I understand the weight that comes with that role, but there are times when it feels like none of it is truly appreciated. It’s as if they see it as my duty, my obligation, and forget the sacrifices I make because they don’t see them directly. They think it’s just what I’m supposed to do, not realizing the toll it takes on me. It’s hard feeling unseen, especially when you give everything and still feel like you’re not being valued for the effort. -- Unappreciated Efforts

DEAR UNAPPRECIATED EFFORTS: Chances are, your wife feels overwhelmed as well. Being a stay-at-home mom takes a tremendous amount of energy and focus as well. Sounds like the two of you need to talk about responsibilities and duties and come to an understanding of what is required for your family. You both need to be able to see what the other is contributing and that all is valuable. Tell your wife how you are feeling and let her know that sometimes you feel unsupported. Leave space for her to reflect those same feelings back to you.

Agree to appreciate each other more and to take time to express your gratitude regularly.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been together for about five months now. When he first asked me to be his girlfriend, he said he was ready for a serious relationship. I’m starting to feel like he doesn’t have any time for me, and I’m questioning whether he’s as committed as he claimed to be. He’s always either working or traveling, and while I understand that his career is demanding, it feels like I’ve been pushed to the back burner. We rarely spend quality time together, and even when we do, I can tell his mind is often elsewhere. He’ll take calls during our dates or cut plans short because of work obligations. It’s gotten to the point where I sometimes feel more like an afterthought than a priority in his life.

I’ve tried to bring this up a few times, but his response is always the same: He tells me how much he cares about me and reassures me that things will get better “once work slows down.” The problem is that work never seems to slow down, and I’m left feeling lonely and unfulfilled in the relationship. I don’t want to come across as needy, but I also don’t think it’s unreasonable to want my partner to make time for me. Do you think I should break up with him? -- Distracted Boyfriend

DEAR DISTRACTED BOYFRIEND: It’s time for a heart-to-heart. It is still early in your relationship, but it has been long enough to have a sense of the rhythm you can expect from your boyfriend. Since you are not comfortable with how he engages with you, you must talk about it directly. Explain that you don’t mean to be pushy, but you do expect him to carve out time to pay attention to you. You have to make it clear to him how you want him to show that you are a priority. Then, see if he tries. If you like him enough to see if you have a future, you have to be open and direct with him about what is important to you and what you want from him. Otherwise, he cannot know.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I met a nice guy recently. He and I have had coffee together a few times and have taken walks in the neighborhood. I met him when I was running an errand in my community. Initially, I liked how he asked me to do things that don’t cost anything but time, and our outings have been very pleasant. I discovered the other day that he is unemployed and has been for nearly a year. That’s why he hasn’t invited me out on a proper date. I know these things can happen, but I’m concerned. I don’t hear him talking about pounding the pavement to find a job. I hear more of what sounds like despondency or even depression. I like this guy, but I am not inclined to be his savior. I don’t want to abandon him, but I don’t have the inclination to help him turn his life around. What should I do? -- Met A Man

DEAR MET A MAN: Continue to be kind to this man and encourage him to find a job. Set boundaries around what you will and will not do with him. Be clear about what you want in a relationship -- including character, values and stability. Talk to him about his goals and desires. If you want to be his friend, say as much. It is also okay to kindly wish him well and pivot away.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend and I have been close since high school; however, recently it feels like she’s started to ghost me. She doesn’t answer my calls anymore, and when she does respond to my texts, her replies are short and vague, as if she doesn’t really want to talk to me. We live in different states now, which makes it harder to stay connected. I can’t just drop by to check on her, and that distance makes this situation even more painful. The last time we talked in person, she seemed to be in good spirits, but she did open up about struggling with her mental health. I told her I was there for her no matter what, but now I’m wondering if I did or said something wrong, or if she’s pulling away because she’s dealing with things I don’t fully understand.

I miss her so much, and I hate feeling like our friendship is slipping away. At the same time, I don’t want to pressure her if she’s going through something tough. I just don’t know how to reach out in a way that shows I care without making her feel overwhelmed. Should I give her space and wait for her to come to me, or should I keep trying to reach out and let her know I’m here? -- Besties

DEAR BESTIES: Write your friend a letter and tell her how much you miss her. Tell her you don’t want to lose your close bond even though you no longer live in the same town. Add that you hope that if she needs anything, she will reach out to you or to someone else. Remind her that she is not alone.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My family had a big gathering at Christmas, and we exchanged a lot of gifts. In the end, though, I noticed that my 8-year-old niece got fewer gifts than the rest of the kids. I could tell that she felt uncomfortable about that. It’s not that I think every child should get exactly the same number of packages, but it was obvious that many family members didn’t think about her and instead showered the other kids with lots of stuff. She ended up retreating to a corner of the house and not engaging much with the other children even though they are all cousins and close in age. How can I address this so that it doesn’t happen again? -- Short Shrift

DEAR SHORT SHRIFT: Speak to the other adults in the family and share your observation. Be specific about the division of gifts since they probably did not pay attention. Note that it is important to avoid playing favorites among the children. Of course, parents are expected to shower more gifts upon their own children, but at group holiday gatherings, it is kind and thoughtful to consider all of the children and make sure that they all feel loved and seen.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)