DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been in touch with someone I have been meeting online for the past two years. We both have the same physical condition, but he's more outgoing and has a full social life, whereas I am the opposite. I have started attending events at the organization where he works to get support for my needs, but we have never introduced ourselves in person. I have anxiety and codependency issues, which I told him in a direct message when he said to let him know when I wanted to meet with him.

I got too nervous to introduce myself the other day at the office, and I don't go again until next week, though there may be events coming up in the next few days that he may attend. I don't want to pester him or drive him away, but I don't know how to initiate anything. I have never formed a relationship on my own in my life; I’ve made friends in school and through family, never organically. This person is there for everyone else, but will he be there for me? I'm afraid of dying alone and having to plan for a public funeral because I'm better with cats than people. I have been late at things all my life. How do I approach him without being needy or resorting to drink? -- Lone Wolf

DEAR LONE WOLF: Take a deep breath and calm down. Don’t place all of your emotions at this man’s feet -- that would be off-putting. Instead, start by telling yourself that you would like to meet him in person as your first step. Invite him to meet you. Agree on something simple, like grabbing tea or ice cream: something noncommittal that allows you to sit and talk for a few minutes. Don’t go in with an agenda or worried thoughts about your end of life. Just be present. Talk about things you have discussed over the time you have been communicating online. Don’t allow yourself to draw conclusions. Decide that you will enjoy the moment. Then see what happens.

DEAR HARRIETTE: When I left my childhood home, I knew only how to make my mother's meatloaf, open a can of baked beans and bake a potato. This was even the dinner I served on dates. I branched out on my limited budget by trying different meatloaf recipes, then chicken. My love of foreign food has made me try new recipes as I grew more confident, and today I am known among my circle of friends as a great cook -- though I still read recipes to get new ideas.

It is surprising how many good recipes are simple. I try to keep it manageable -- if I have a more complicated recipe, I will pair it with something simple that can be made ahead. Most people are delighted to be invited to dinner and aren't aware when something isn't perfect. So your advice to “Cooking Anxiety” to start small was on point. -- Good Cook Today

DEAR GOOD COOK TODAY: One small step at a time and a willingness to learn: the magic ingredients!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband smokes weed pretty much every day. During the pandemic, he got to the point of smoking all day long from before sunrise until going to sleep. We were all at home then, and it was infuriating to have to smell smoke while I was working in the other room. Fast forward to several years later, and the trend hasn’t changed much. He works intermittently, and I now work from home full time. He still smokes nonstop. No matter what I say, he continues. I have asked him not to smoke during office hours. He balks and tells me I shouldn’t be working at home anyway. He says this is his house, and he can do what he wants. Where are my rights in this? I cannot stand that my house constantly smells like weed. No candle or air freshener takes the smell out, either. What can I do? -- Weed Invasion

DEAR WEED INVASION: You are facing at least two serious issues: addiction and disrespect. Have a serious talk with your husband. Ask him why he smokes so much. Why does he need to smoke before sunrise? What’s going on with him? Tell him how his smoking affects you. Ask him to respect you and your time by not smoking when you are working. Since you live in a shared space, you would like to make mutually agreed-upon hours for certain activities, especially smoking. Reiterate that this is important to you, and it feels blatantly disrespectful when he ignores you.

Know, however, that he may not be able to stop. While some say that weed is not addictive, his behavior says otherwise. You may have to decide what you will do if he won’t stop.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have not gotten along with my husband well for years. I often think about ending our marriage, but then I look at my single friends of a certain age and see that all they talk about is wanting to find a man. I am at a loss for how to make my marriage more fulfilling. At the same time, I don’t want to be alone and lonely. Do I stay to avoid my friends’ situation? What can I do to get my marriage on course? -- Frustrated

DEAR FRUSTRATED: Figure out what you want and need in your marriage. Review your life today, and identify what you believe would make you happy if things could change. Be as specific as possible. Then talk to your husband. Explain to him how you have been feeling and what you believe is missing in your marriage. Tell him you don’t want to live like you do now and that you do want to reinvigorate your life together. Ask him what he thinks and what would make him happier. Check in to learn about his state of mind. You may be surprised to learn that he doesn’t share your view. Wherever he is, let him know where you are. Ask him if you can work together to revitalize your bond. If you can both put effort into your marriage, there is a chance to give it new life. Make a concerted effort with him before walking out the door.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been dating for four years. For a while, it felt like we were building a life together -- a real future. We dreamed together. Aside from the love we shared as romantic partners, we were both ambitious and helped push each other along in our careers as well. Over time and after much trust was built, we began exploring business ventures together. Like any business, we’ve experienced ups and downs, but overall, I’ve loved the process of entrepreneurship. Unfortunately, though, I think my feelings for my partner have changed. Our relationship has become mundane. We are not as romantic or as happy as we used to be. I don’t feel like a priority to him anymore, and he seems a lot less ambitious than he used to be. It feels like we’re different people now and at different stages in our lives, and I’m not sure I see a future for us anymore. The thought of having shared businesses, though, is keeping me from making the hard decision.

I keep ignoring my unhappiness because we are so heavily financially involved. Should I try to make things work, or is it possible to have a platonic business relationship with an ex? -- Turning Point

DEAR TURNING POINT: Check your legal documents to ensure that you know your standing in all of your business ventures. Then talk to your boyfriend. Tell him you do not feel like your romantic relationship is currently working. Find out what he thinks. You may just need a reboot on your relationship. Don’t be too quick to walk away. No matter what, it will take time to talk through your feelings and come to an agreement on the way forward. Let him know where you stand. If you want to stay in business with him but not as his romantic partner, be clear about that. Time will let you know if you can work together under these new conditions.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A couple of months ago, a close friend and I decided to move in together. We began our hunt for housing and found the perfect place with separate bedrooms and bathrooms for each of us. This sounded great to me because the trouble with roommates usually happens in the shared spaces. We signed a yearlong lease, and we enjoyed our first month there decorating, cooking together and more. The second month rolled around, and my roommate didn’t have her share of the rent and claimed to have been laid off. She only admitted this to me once I asked why she was late on payment. She’s now asked if I can spot her so that we do not lose the apartment. She says she can begin a payment plan with me and close it out as soon as she gets another job.

I would love to stay here, but paying for both of us is not what I signed up for. Should I help a friend who may seriously be in need, or should I be suspicious? -- Next Steps

DEAR NEXT STEPS: Check your lease to determine your liability. Suggest that your roommate ask her parents or other friends to spot the rent. Do your best to get her to find the money elsewhere. Find out how long you have before eviction. Sit with her and make a concrete plan for staying in the apartment. Don’t just take on her debt.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)