DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently working in an industry that I love, but it is unstable. I’ve been working on the creative side of TV and film for the past eight years. I am currently employed and thankfully have never experienced being laid off. I’ve done a lot of freelance work, so I know what it feels like for a project to end, but honestly, I have always been lucky enough to be offered new work pretty steadily at the end of projects I’ve worked on. As of late, though, I see how much the industry is changing and how many strikes and layoffs are happening, and I have developed crippling anxiety. Even though I currently love the role I’m in and it is full-time (not short-term), I find myself always worrying about the what-ifs of my industry and my future. It is emotionally chaotic and keeps me from being able to focus, and it pushes me into negative thought patterns. How do I keep myself from worrying about what’s to come? -- Instability

DEAR INSTABILITY: Start by practicing gratitude every day. When you wake up, be thankful for the work and life that you have, and focus on giving it your all. Approach each day anew. Look at the tasks ahead. Think about how you can make yourself invaluable as you go about your day. Be a positive and thoughtful team member and problem solver whenever possible.

Also, be practical. Given that you work in a volatile industry that has suffered many blows in recent years, it is wise to be prepared. Save as much money as you possibly can. Do your best to create a nest egg of at least six months’ worth of your expenses. In this way, you will be capable of taking care of yourself should you lose your job. Look around to see what opportunities exist outside of your company as well, just so you are aware of what could be there for you if you need it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: In response to “He Snores,” the person whose new partner snored like crazy, I snored also. My wife pretty much ignored it until I had a TIA (mini-stroke). Her cardiologist came by for a visit and, after a couple of questions, said I probably had sleep apnea. Boy, was he correct. After a sleep study, it was found that I was waking 53 times an hour, on average. That's chronic sleep apnea. I was put on a CPAP machine, and the first night I went from waking 53 times an hour to three. I couldn't remember the last time I had such a good night’s sleep. Tell "He Snores" to get her friend to the sleep doctor. She could well save his life. That TIA I had could have been a major stroke attributed to chronic sleep apnea. -- Life Saver

DEAR LIFE SAVER: Thank you for sharing your experience. You are right: Sleep apnea affects millions of people, and there are healthy solutions for people with this challenge. The CPAP machine has been a game-changer for some. There is also an implant that has been successful for others.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend of mine is in a relationship, and in my opinion, her partner is not good to her. From what she tells me and what I observe, he seems selfish, abrasive, cheap and not affectionate or protective of her. At a social event, he asked me jokingly why it feels like I don’t like him. I gave him a serious answer -- a diluted version of my thoughts on how he treats my friend. I did not disrespect him or raise my voice, and although he initiated this conversation, my friend is upset with me for sharing my opinion with him. Was I wrong? -- Crossing the Line

DEAR CROSSING THE LINE: This is tricky, as friends do expect a covenant to exist between them where they do not reveal their innermost thoughts about partners. It is typically understood that you keep those opinions to yourself. The big caveat is that sometimes it is best for a friend to stand up -- to actually be a friend -- and tell the truth when it needs to be heard. This can sometimes lead to the end of a friendship if the revelation feels like a betrayal. It can also lead to honest and thoughtful reflection on what is actually going on in a relationship.

You can apologize to your friend if she feels you betrayed the unspoken social contract, but add that you are genuinely concerned for her and worry that her boyfriend is not treating her well. Since he asked, you felt compelled to tell him. In the end, you want to make sure she knows how concerned you are and why.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently met up with some old friends at a birthday gathering. These are friends I grew up with, and while we stay in touch, I haven’t seen them in six or seven years. This gathering was on a weekday and had some light refreshments and wine available. After three hours together, one of my friends was extremely drunk. I noticed that at the bar, instead of enjoying the wine available, he had been ordering hard liquor and purchasing rounds for others as well. I kept hearing others say things like “that’s just how he is,” “bartenders love him,” “hard liquor is more his speed,” etc. I feel concerned, but everyone else in his life seems passive about it. Am I too far removed to express concern? -- Should I Intervene?

DEAR SHOULD I INTERVENE?: Consider yourself a blessing put in this man’s life at this time. Perhaps you are there to shine a light for him on what he is doing. Invite him to get together with you in person so you can speak face-to-face, but avoid meeting at a bar. Tell him how nice it was to see him after so many years. Ask him about his life so you can get a sense of what’s going on with him. Then ask him for permission to share some feedback with him. If he says yes, tell him that you observed heavy drinking on his part and overheard people agreeing that he drinks a lot. Tell him you are concerned about him and felt it was important to tell him you are worried about what seems to be excessive drinking. He may get angry or dismiss your concerns, but at least you will have planted the seed.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My ex-partner and the father of all five of our grown children recently broke up with his longtime girlfriend. This is a woman he began dating around 20 years ago when he decided to leave me to raise our children alone. While he didn’t fully abandon our children, he did betray us, and I was left to explain why. He is now abruptly single and in need of a place to stay. He has asked me if he can stay in one of the spare bedrooms of my home, which was once our home -- the home he left. While we have built up a friendship in recent years, I cannot help but feel reminded of how he left us, and left me alone to raise our five children. Should I help him? -- Open Door

DEAR OPEN DOOR: Think long and hard before you welcome your ex back into your home. He is emotionally vulnerable right now due to the breakup. You are experiencing whiplash due to the memories of when he left your family, and your children, while older now, will also be impacted by him moving back into the family home. Schedule a time to sit and talk with him about the impact that this move might have on everyone. Yes, he is in immediate need of a roof over his head, but that is not your problem. What are his thoughts on a timeline? How will he address this change with your children? How does he expect you to feel about this, given the circumstances of his departure? Make him accountable for this moment. Also find out why they broke up. What was his role in this?

While you may want to support him in his time of need, you have to look at the big picture. Without intending to reject him at this vulnerable moment, you need to protect your heart and the soul of your family. Think about alternatives, like friends or relatives who may have an extra room. Worst case scenario, while tricky, could be allowing him to move in for a specific, short period while he looks for permanent housing. This may be risky, as once someone moves in, it can be difficult to get them to move out.

DEAR HARRIETTE: You had a great answer to “Delivery Room,” the woman whose husband wanted to invite his whole family to observe during their baby’s delivery. You could also suggest that she consider -- only consider! -- the extra relatives being present if her husband promises to strip from the waist down for the entire delivery. Maybe then he’ll realize how exposed and vulnerable a woman feels while having a baby. -- Creative Thinking

DEAR CREATIVE THINKING: I absolutely LOVE this idea! Rather than getting defensive, she can show the extended family just how uncomfortable it can be to have folks watch a baby emerge from your loins. This is not a TV show!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)