DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My wife and I haven’t had a vacation with just the two of us since before our twins were born four years ago.

Since my wife is currently home fulltime, for the last few years when my sister-in-law and her husband have gone on vacation they have left the kids with us. My sister-in-law has been offering for over a year now to watch our boys so my wife and I can get away, but my wife refuses to let her or anyone else do overnights with our kids.

This is not good for our marriage and I keep telling her that. What else can I do to wake her up to how much we need time for just the two of us? --- WANT TIME WITH MY WIFE

DEAR WANT TIME: It isn’t easy for some young mothers to take that first break from being Mommy, but it’s got to happen sooner or later.

Start small. Shoot for a long weekend or even just an overnight. Pick somewhere not too far from home, but far enough to give yourselves the simple luxury of being alone in the car for two or three uninterrupted hours. Follow it up with an adults-only meal in a grown-up type restaurant, and a whole night to spend as you used to before the kids came along.

Surviving a night or two away from your twins could help convince your wife that it’s okay to loosen the reins every now and then.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: “D” and I have been good friends since we were 11 years old. Last month she told me in an email that she has realized she is gay after meeting another woman she is strongly attracted to. I am happy she met someone special, especially since up until now not too many of her relationships ended well for her.

I am perfectly fine with her lifestyle choices, but it makes me wonder if she ever felt anything other than friendship for me and I feel a little awkward when we are hanging out together because that question is always in the back of my mind.

Do I say something to clear the air or just get over it and get on with our friendship like it used to be? --- TO ASK OR NOT TO ASK

DEAR TO ASK: Your friend was honest with you. You need to decide if you’re ready to be honest with her.

If you believe not knowing how she feels about you sexually will permanently affect your friendship, then you need to talk to her about it.

After you have her answer, if you still want her to be a part of your life, then you have to come to terms with what she tells you. It’s a friendship you’ve both invested a lot of time in, and old friends don’t grow on trees.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When I turned 18 and changed over my custodial bank accounts into regular ones, my mom insisted she be on the accounts too. Now she checks my banking activity on-line and is always telling me what I should do with my money.

Can you give me one good reason to not have her name taken off my accounts? --- SON OF A SNOOP

DEAR SON OF A SNOOP: If you truly believe your mother is out for your cash, you need to get her name off the accounts immediately. On the other hand, if you trust your mom, I can think of at least three good reasons to keep her onboard for a while.

Look at it as a precaution similar to leaving a key to your house with a reliable neighbor or trusted friend before going out-of-town. Such joint accounts can be a temporary peace of mind measure that’s especially useful for college students, young single military service members, or others who find themselves far from home for extended periods of time.

Parent/young adult child joint accounts have been referred to as money management with “training wheels.” Having a more experienced set of eyes on your accounts may come with the modest cost of having to listen to a parental lecture on what Mom considers less than sound spending habits, but that’s a small price to pay for a potentially invaluable safety net.

Many banks offer benefits like higher interest or fewer fees for bundled accounts. Hitching your accounts to your parents’ for a bit might help everyone save, or even make, a little extra cash.