DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My wife doesn’t know how to tell my parents that she really doesn’t want the diaper service they paid for as part of her baby shower. We really appreciate the gesture, but we feel we’re capable of washing the diapers and would rather they spend their money on something else either for themselves or their new granddaughter. They were so excited about the gift when they gave it to us that neither my wife nor I want to hurt their feelings.

How do we tell them thanks but no thanks? --- ON TOP OF THE DIAPER SITUATION

DEAR ON TOP OF THE DIAPER SITUATION: Perhaps the best case you can make is the one you presented in your letter — that you can think of other things you’d like to see them spend their money on.

Before you turn the gift down, though, consider not only does the paid-for service save you money, but more importantly it gives you more time to enjoy your new baby, which is priceless. Besides, if it’s making your folks happy that they’re doing something to help you and your wife during this time of adjusting to life as a growing family, then why not enjoy the gift?

Whistleblower Has Neighbor Worried

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: We have a grumpy new neighbor in our block of townhouses who loves to pretend he’s the man in charge. He recently contacted the police about a group of kids riding their bikes in the cul-de-sac near his house, which he claimed was in violation of the county’s stay-at-home order.

Turns out the kids were doing nothing wrong. They were staying on their bikes (all wore helmets), and kept in the street, at proper distances. It’s the same group of kids who usually use the same spot on weekends and when the weather is good enough to ride bikes and skateboards, and with the schools closed for the year, they are around a lot more than usual. We found out about the cops coming to investigate because our daughter was one of the kids.

If he picked on the kids, a few of the other neighbors and I are worried he’s going to report on anything and everything that happens in our neighborhood involving even the smallest groups of people, even now that the restrictions are beginning to lift and we’re allowed more freedom, so long as everyone abides by all the current pandemic regulations.

So far, everyone on the block has done pretty well at keeping in “distant touch”, and I know we should have nothing to fear, but this man is making everyone feel like they’re criminals.

I have no fear of him, and want to say something directly to him about minding his own business, but my husband says it will just make things worse. Do you agree? --- CRANK’S NEIGHBOR

DEAR CRANK’S NEIGHBOR: I tend to agree with your husband. So long as the kids and adults in the neighborhood do indeed comply with your state and local regulations and restrictions, all your self-appointed neighborhood watchman is likely to achieve is to make himself as big a nuisance to the local authorities as he already is with you.

Besides, your confronting him individually could lead to his turning his attention more closely on you and your family.

Gamer Lost in Space Leaves GF on Earth

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When I first met my boyfriend in college, I thought it was kind of cute how he and his buddies got sucked into their gaming. To be honest, it gave me a chance to keep on track with my course load, which was a lot heavier than his.

Now that we’re living together, it’s really getting on my nerves when all he wants to do is sit in the spare bedroom and either play his own games or follow esports. I get that he works hard at a very stressful job, but so do I.

I don’t want to break up, but I’m considering trying a “games or me” ultimatum on him. My worry is, what if it backfires? --- TIRED OF BEING SECOND FIDDLE

DEAR TIRED OF BEING SECOND FIDDLE: If you haven’t had an open conversation with your boyfriend about what you’re feeling, then you’re doing both of you a disservice. It doesn’t need to be an ultimatum, but he should know how much the constant gaming bothers you. You may find he thought the current arrangement was working for you both, given that it worked well in the past.

If, however, after you’ve hashed things out, you continue to be frustrated by the amount of time your boyfriend devotes to his gaming, then you might want to seriously start considering how much of a future you two have together as a couple.