DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Back when my sons were little, my father used to take them with him to buy scratch-offs and the occasional big jackpot lottery ticket. He even used to give them to the boys as stocking stuffers and in their birthday cards. It was just a fun little thing to do. My dad never expected to hit it big, and he certainly never spent more than a few bucks here and there on it. And that’s as close to gambling as anyone in the family did as long as I can remember.

I am beginning to fear my oldest son is becoming hooked on on-line gambling. It’s legal in our state, and I don’t claim to understand much about it at all, beyond that my daughter-in-law has begun to say things to us about how much time and money my son is spending on what he still claims is a harmless hobby.

He’s a grown man, makes his own money, and lives his own life with his wife and my granddaughter. But it makes me uneasy, especially since when I say anything to him about the gambling, he gets very defensive and tells me to mind my own business.

Beyond worrying, is there anything else I should be doing? --- GAMBLER’S MOM

DEAR GAMBLER’S MOM: You’re a mom, and worrying is a big part of the job description. But now that your son’s an adult with a family of his own, his welfare is, or at least should be, more in the hands of his wife, and if she’s old enough, his daughter.

Since your daughter-in-law has spoken to you about her concerns, by all means, offer her your support, and back her up if she asks for help. While it’s up to her to take the lead here, it might prove at least a little easier all-around if she has a strong ally in you.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My new girlfriend is a few years younger than me, and even though she has been in at least two serious relationships, which both ended badly, she keeps telling me she is not ready to have sex yet, at least until we have been together for six months or more. She says she has to be sure I am in it for the long haul, because she has been burned before, and is convinced sex is as much a complication as it is a natural next step.

So far we have found enough things in common to do, so the physical part has seemed less important. I am beginning to feel, though, that she may never be ready to be with me, and if not, what is the point of continuing in what in all other ways is a romantic relationship? --- STILL WAITING

DEAR STILL WAITING: Given that your girlfriend’s had some rough times in her earlier love life, I can understand her desire to want to be confident and comfortable in your relationship before moving things to the next level.

The question you seem to be asking is whether or not both she and what you have together are worth a wait. The answer is all on you, as I see it.

Right now, by continuing to pursue common interests outside the bedroom, you’re potentially building a strong foundation for a long-term relationship. If you see her as someone you could get serious about, then patience is your best option. If not, then give her a break and move on.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When my husband and I got married two years ago, his grandmother chose not only to not attend the wedding, but to also urge the rest of his family to also skip it because she didn’t like that her “favorite” grandson was marrying a white woman. Not only a white woman, but a Catholic one at that.

Because of how she treated us, and what I know she thinks about me, I am not all that interested in including her at my baby shower, but I know the omission will hurt my mother-in-law, who is a truly kind and loving lady, and has never treated me as anything but a daughter since my engagement to her son. She does, however, freely acknowledge that her mother is difficult, but also feels my reaching out to her will perhaps make a difference in how her mother sees me.

Tell me why I should put myself on the line again and invite a woman who clearly hates me to an event I am otherwise very excited about, with the exception of fearing she’ll turn up? --- HATED GRANDDAUGHTER-IN-LAW

DEAR HATED GRANDDAUGHTER-IN-LAW: Your husband’s grandmother has made her feelings about his choice of a wife abundantly clear. If she didn’t attend your wedding, it doesn’t seem likely she’d want to be on hand for this next happy occasion.

That said, since it means a lot to your mother-in-law, you could go ahead and include your grandmother-in-law on the guest list. You’ll have extended the olive branch. If she accepts, perhaps your mother-in-law is right, and her mother is ready to see you in a new light. If she declines or ignores the invitation altogether, nothing will have changed, through no fault of your own.