DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I think my niece is nuts. At 43 she had IVF with some of her frozen eggs fertilized by a sperm donor. She didn’t share the news of her pregnancy until she got to 12 weeks and everything was looking good for the twins that took.
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I’m all for bringing babies into this world, but to purposely have your first children at an age when most people are sending their kids off to college is a little more than a little weird to me. I can’t imagine taking on not just one but two infants at my niece’s age. Imagine being in your sixties when your kids are finishing high school.
Yes, she has a good career and a steady partner, but he is even older than her and has grown kids of his own, one of which graduated with a master’s degree this year.
I think it’s selfish, but I would never say so to my niece. --- TOO OLD FOR BABIES
DEAR TOO OLD FOR BABIES: There’s nothing new in women in their 40s becoming first-time mothers. As a matter of fact, although not quite a trend, it’s happening more often here and in other parts of the world.
You clearly have your own strong opinion on the subject of your niece’s pregnancy, and I hope you stick to your intention of not sharing it with the expectant mother or anyone else close to her.
I also hope you offer your niece and her partner the same support and encouragement you would any other expectant family members. With twins on the way, they may very well be glad to have some extra help now and again.