DEAR HARRIETTE: This Thanksgiving was an absolute disaster. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a year, and this holiday felt like the perfect time to introduce him to my family. I was nervous because, while I love them, my family is known to be a little unconventional. They’re loud, opinionated and tend to say exactly what’s on their minds, no matter how inappropriate.

From the moment we walked in, it was like a circus. My uncle started grilling my boyfriend about his job and his plans for the future, and then my aunt jumped in to question him about his political beliefs right in the middle of dinner. My cousins thought it would be hilarious to share every embarrassing story they could think of about me, and my mom kept dropping hints about how she’s “ready for grandchildren.” My boyfriend handled it all as well as he could, but I could tell he was overwhelmed.

I’m worried this whole experience might have left a bad impression on my boyfriend, and I feel embarrassed about how things turned out. I want him to feel welcomed by my family, but instead, it felt like he was under a microscope. How can I smooth things over with him and also set some boundaries with my family for the future? -- Crossing the Line

DEAR CROSSING THE LINE: Since you already know what your family is like, you know that little that you say is going to get them to change. So don’t promise anything to your boyfriend about their behavior in the future. Instead, you can apologize for how overwhelming the experience may have been for him. If he likes being with you and wants to get to know you and your family better, he will need to learn to spar with them in an amicable way and not get too defensive. Ask him how he felt after the dinner and how he’s doing now. Find out if he is turned off by their behavior, or if he found it amusing. You never know. He may have some kooky family members, too, and he could be more OK with it than you think. If there is a chance for him in your future, he is going to have to be able to spar with them on occasion.

DEAR HARRIETTE: After years of using traditional notebooks, I decided to transition to digital planning, especially as schools are now adapting to digital tools. Back in grade school, pen and paper were my go-to, and I loved the simplicity they offered. While I was excited about the potential for better organization, the switch hasn’t been as smooth as I hoped. I find myself missing the tactile joy of writing and feeling overwhelmed by learning new apps and systems. I don’t want to give up, but I am starting to wonder if digital tools are truly the right fit for me. The promise of efficiency and flexibility is tempting, yet the adjustment feels daunting. How can I embrace this change without losing the joy and comfort of my old ways? -- Digital Planning Dilemmas

DEAR DIGITAL PLANNING DILEMMAS: Who says you have to choose? I use a mix of digital resources and old-fashioned notepads. This makes me feel comfortable and satisfies my desire to write things down. The technology is wonderful for support in organizing thoughts, dates and details quickly. You can design the way you organize yourself using whatever combination of tools you desire!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend recently ran her first marathon, and while we’re all super proud of her accomplishment, it has completely taken over every conversation. Whether we’re at brunch, hanging out or texting in our group chat, she always brings the topic back to her training, the race itself or how she’s already planning for the next one. At first, it was exciting to hear about her journey because we know how much work she put into it. But now, weeks later, it feels like we’re stuck in a marathon of marathon stories.

The rest of our friend group is starting to get annoyed, but we don’t know how to bring it up without sounding dismissive of her achievement. We really do want to celebrate her success, but we also want to be able to talk about other things again. How can we kindly let her know it’s time to switch up the conversation without hurting her feelings? -- Enough Already

DEAR ENOUGH ALREADY: Pull your friend aside, and tell her you need to talk to her about something sensitive. Acknowledge how proud you are of her accomplishment, and let her take that in. Then tell her that she may not realize it, but she has been monopolizing your conversations for weeks with endless details about her marathon experience, leaving little room for others to talk about their lives. Note that she probably doesn’t realize that she is doing this, but the group is growing weary of her nonstop stories about the marathon. Encourage her to listen more and reengage with the group, leaving space for everyone to talk.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been a singer since my elementary and high school days and often competed in singing contests, though I failed twice. These failures made me hesitant to join my college choir, but I decided to join for scholarship purposes, as it would help ease my parents’ financial burden. Initially, I was excited to be part of the choir, but during our first rehearsal on stage, I completely froze. While I’ve always loved singing in private, performing in front of an audience fills me with anxiety and self-doubt. Despite this fear, I know how much music means to me, and I don’t want to give up on something I’m so passionate about. I want to overcome my stage fright and find the joy in performing again, but I’m unsure where to start. -- Stage Fright

DEAR STAGE FRIGHT: Talk to the choir director about your predicament. Explain how much you love to sing, but that you need some coaching to get past the jitters. Chances are, you can work together to overcome your discomfort.

On your own, practice singing in front of the mirror, and give it your all. You can also tape yourself singing and share the playback with friends. Work hard to be present when they watch it. Ask friends to serve as a small audience for you to perform live. Keep practicing in front of small groups as you build your confidence. Go for it.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just learned that a friend of mine “Arthur,” passed away. Tragically, another friend figured it out and had the police do a wellness check. The paramedics discovered Arthur’s body and took him away, but no one ever called my friend back. My friend called around until he learned that Arthur had died.

Now we are searching for Arthur’s family. I realize that as well as I knew him, I don’t know any of his family members or have their contact information. As we are searching for them, we have to tell a few people in order to do our research. Of course they are all grieving, too. We have asked that nobody post on social media because we really want the family to learn of his passing first. How do you get people to keep such news to themselves? This is such a terrible situation. -- Dealing With Death

DEAR DEALING WITH DEATH: I am so sorry for your loss. As you see, there are many lessons in this tragic story. As connected as so many of us are, we don’t often know our good friends’ in-case-of-emergency contact information. Let this be a wake-up call for all of us to gather those numbers right now.

In terms of keeping Arthur’s death off of social media, you can ask the select people you talk to if they will wait until you find the family. Promise that you will contact them the moment they can say something. Know that you have a day or two -- at best -- before someone will reveal his passing publicly -- not in malice, but simply out of grief.

If you do not find the family within a couple of days, my recommendation is to post something on the deceased’s page that acknowledges his passing and invites anyone who knows the family to be in touch with you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was seeing someone for the past few months, but now everything is falling apart. I really wanted to have a chance to sit down and talk to him in person before walking away, but he is refusing to talk to me. Nothing terrible happened between us -- at least not that I am aware of -- but I feel like he is ghosting me. This is an awful feeling. We were so happy and seemingly connected, and now it’s like a door got slammed in my face. How can I get him to at least talk to me so that I can understand? -- Saying Goodbye

DEAR SAYING GOODBYE: Sadly, you don’t always get to say goodbye in an optimal way at the end of relationships. It can be messy and unpredictable how things fizzle out. It is also understandable that it feels awkward and incomplete when one half of a relationship abruptly stops communicating. There is nothing you can do to force this man to talk to you. It is time for you to pivot and tend to your hurting heart. In time, you will be able to move on, even if you never fully learn what precipitated his departure. Right now you need to be strong and turn away from him.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)