DEAR HARRIETTE: My uncle was recently diagnosed with liver cancer. He caught it early, so he was able to get chemo and has had a couple of surgeries in the past few months. We live in different states, but I have always had a close relationship with him.

I work full time, but I have been thinking about visiting him for a week or two. I can’t afford to take that much time off, but something is telling me that this may be the last time I get to spend quality time with him. Should I visit him? -- Sick Uncle, Raleigh, North Carolina

DEAR SICK UNCLE: It is honorable that you want to spend time with your uncle. Too often, when young people move away from home and start their lives, they disconnect from family. This is usually unintentional, but it's still common.

You absolutely should go visit your uncle. Work it out with your employer. Speak to your boss about your family crisis and ask how much time you can take off to support him.

If your uncle has the energy and ability to use technology, set him up with FaceTime or Skype so that you can have video chats when you are back home. He will appreciate your presence in person and your continuing connection to him by phone.

While you are with him, do your best to ensure that he is set up with the medical supports he needs. If there is any family nearby, talk to them about how they can help him during this fragile time.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a group of 10 friends from college. We are all still close and meet up regularly for brunch or dinner. I have always had a hunch that one of my friends might be a lesbian. All through college, she never seemed interested in guys, and she still has never had a boyfriend. When she drinks, she gets very touchy-feely with my friends and me, which at first I thought was because she was intoxicated, but now I think it’s her true feelings coming out. Do you think it’s appropriate for me to ask? I want to make sure she knows I will always be her friend no matter her sexual preference. -- Friend Might Be Gay, Des Moines, Iowa

DEAR FRIEND MIGHT BE GAY: Good for you that you have observed what may be the true feelings of your friend that emerge when she’s drinking. This means that she is probably uncomfortable sharing them while sober. Since you are good friends, it would be wonderful for you to speak to her privately and ask her if she is gay. Tell her why you think so, and immediately add that you accept her as she is. Suggest that she open up and talk about her life with your friend group. I'm sure it's difficult to notice her getting touchy-feely after she drinks without coming out and talking about what’s really going on for her. Offer to be a sounding board. If she doesn’t want to tell the whole group, that’s OK, too. Make sure she knows you have her back.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been discussing marriage a lot recently. A couple of months ago, he asked me to go engagement ring shopping together to get a sense of my ring style. Although some people would not do this because they want it to be a surprise, I liked the idea of picking out my own ring. I showed my boyfriend a ring that I absolutely loved, which was a picture of my friend’s engagement ring. When I told my friend that I wanted a similar engagement ring, she got upset with me. I asked her why, and she explained that she didn’t want me copying her ring style. What is your opinion about claiming ring styles? Am I in the wrong? -- Copied Engagement Ring, Miami

DEAR COPIED ENGAGEMENT RING: I can understand why your friend is uncomfortable about this, but it sounds like she blew it out of proportion. You have some untangling to do. First, you can talk to your boyfriend and tell him that the ring you showed him belongs to a friend. Point out that while you like it, you hope that a variation of that style will ultimately be the choice so that you have something unique.

For your friend, tell her that your love of her ring should be a compliment to her. The last thing that you intended was to insult her. You were trying to respond to your boyfriend’s desire to get you a ring that you would love. Assure her that you will do your best to select a ring that is unique to you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I grew up traveling a lot. I have lived in four countries and have visited over 25 countries. I love to travel and would consider it one of my passions.

My wife, on other hand, grew up in a very different setting. Her family rarely took vacations, and if they did, it was to Florida. She is now 31 and has still never left the U.S.

I always try to convince my wife to join me on my business trips when I go overseas, but she is uncomfortable leaving our home. Do you think this trait is something that can change, or will she be like this our entire marriage? -- Travel Bug, Canton, Ohio

DEAR TRAVEL BUG: Something for you to contemplate is that you selected a wife who had an opposite experience to yours. What about her was and is attractive to you? Part of it must be how grounded she is. You are going to have to accept that her sense of adventure is different from yours. That said, you can introduce her to more of the world, but you may want to start in the United States. Schedule short trips to various landmark destinations that will open her eyes -- and yours -- to the wonders of this country. Let her get her feet wet, so to speak, on American soil. This may intrigue her enough to want to go overseas with you.

She will never likely be ready to travel in the way you prefer. That means that either your international travel days are over, or you travel solo or with a buddy when you feel the need to take a trip.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend grew up with a dog in his family, and is one of those guys who calls the dog his brother. The dog passed away when my boyfriend was 23, and he was devastated. I had never seen him cry until that point in our relationship.

It has been a couple of months, and my boyfriend has asked me if he and I can get a dog together. As much as I want to say yes to bring that happiness back to my boyfriend, I dislike dogs. I never had any pets growing up, so I don’t understand the whole “bond with an animal” thing. How should I deal with this situation? -- Boyfriend Wants a Dog, Albuquerque, New Mexico

DEAR BOYFRIEND WANTS A DOG: It is common for couples to have differing views about pets. What is important is that you come to an agreement on how you will manage the pets if you ultimately choose to have one (or more). For you, this means softening a bit toward dogs. This doesn’t mean that you have to grow to love dogs, but it would be great for you to be empathetic toward your boyfriend’s attitude.

As it relates to getting a dog, I don’t think you should try to prevent your boyfriend from getting another. He will resent you if you do. Instead, make it clear to him that while you are not into dogs, you are willing for him to get another -- provided he accepts full responsibility for it. Be clear that you do not want to have to engage with the dog.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been living with my partner in our apartment for 2 1/2 years. In all this time, my partner has cooked dinner twice. I’m not sure when it was decided that I would be the chef of the house, but it turned out that way. I am always the one to go grocery shopping after work and come home to cook dinner for the two of us.

Both of us are women, so she can’t use the gender card -- even though that would be crazy, too. Anyhow, I want to ask my partner to cook more, but I fear that after all this time has passed, it might be too late. -- Solo Chef, Dallas

DEAR SOLO CHEF: If you plan to be together for the long haul, you are still in the early stages of your relationship. I recommend weekly meetings for people who live together, where you go over the business of the household and adjust according to the week’s needs. This is a time when you can bring up your observation that the food shopping and cooking seems to have fallen on your shoulders. Tell your partner that you want to share this responsibility. Ask her if she can commit to being an active participant in creating the family meals. Get her to open up about her perspective. This may not be a conscious act on her part. She may view the situation as something that you seemed to enjoy.

Talk about it and make a plan that is more equitable.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)