DEAR HARRIETTE: We had a power outage in our building, so the electric company guy made the rounds to all of our apartments. One of my neighbors opened the door for him -- naked. I learned about this from him when he was working on my apartment. He was so taken aback he said he now avoids her. Other people in my building have said that she suffers from mental illness. I don’t know, but I am worried about her. We have had a lot of trouble with our power, and I don’t want our misfortune to leave her vulnerable. What can I say or do to help her? -- Neighbor in Crisis

DEAR NEIGHBOR IN CRISIS: It is very thoughtful of you to want to look out for your neighbor. If she truly does suffer from mental illness, you may not have the tools to fully support her, but reaching out to check on her is a good idea. Don’t bring up what happened with the electric company worker. Instead, ask how she is doing through all of this and if you can be of any support. If you know of other neighbors who know her better, ask them what you can do to be helpful during this stressful period. Being in good company could help to make her feel safer during this troubling period. Perhaps you can invite her and a small group of others over for a meal -- if you are able to cobble one together with no power.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend who has been promiscuous for all the years I have known her. Suddenly, she is acting like she is a Christian and is saved. She says she has changed her life, which is great, but now she has opinions about all of us. As she is working on her sobriety, she is becoming extremely judgmental of her core friend group. We have been there for her throughout her life. I don’t appreciate being judged about everything I say or do, especially by her. How can I get her to stop talking about us and stay focused on herself? -- Friend in Sobriety

DEAR FRIEND IN SOBRIETY: People in early sobriety often seem obsessed with their own behavior and hypercritical of others. One thing they are often taught is to beware of “people, places and things” that remind them of their past and that might lead them back down a path toward self-destruction. If you and your core group participate in this behavior -- such as drinking alcohol, doing drugs or whatever else she used to do -- it might be best for you to keep your distance for a while. It may be impossible for her to separate her own issues from yours during the early days.

You can also be frank with her. Tell your friend how proud you are of her accomplishments. Wish her well, and then set boundaries. Tell her that it doesn’t work for you when she criticizes you on all that you say and do. Make it clear that you don’t want to sever ties with her right now, but if she is unable to keep her comments about your behavior to herself, you may need to keep your distance -- at least for now.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I hear all this talk about the economy improving, but honestly, my friends and I are not doing much better than a year or so back. It is tough. I feel like we got left behind or something. Or maybe it’s only talk about the major improvements in the economy.

I feel like a failure. I work hard and am always willing to work long hours, but it doesn’t seem to matter. After several years, I now earn less than I used to, not more. How can I keep my spirits up when I am feeling so down about money? It doesn’t help that my friends and I are in the same boat. We are all basically living from hand to mouth. Who knows if any of us will ever be able to retire? I feel like an idiot. I’m not asking you to help me find a better job. Instead, I want to understand how to feel about my station in life. Right now, I just feel worthless. -- Down and Out

DEAR DOWN AND OUT: As you can tell from your friends, you are not alone in not experiencing the bounty that some news reports suggest America is enjoying. It really depends on the industry that you work in whether you would benefit from the changing economy.

That said, you are where you are. Many people’s income decreases as they get older. That’s why it’s wise to save in your early years. If you weren’t able to do that, what you need to figure out today is how you can live on less and save whatever you can for your retirement. Do your best to accept where you are and then to get creative about how you can earn more money. Draw up a budget that helps you to understand exactly what you earn and what your expenses are. Determine how much money you want to save in the next three to five years, then map out a strategy for doing so. You may want to talk to a financial planner to help you. Even on a modest budget, it is possible to set yourself up for your later years. Instead of feeling worthless, claim your value and map out a way to get to your goal.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am about to celebrate a big birthday, and I am planning to have a party. I have spent some time thinking about it and contacting vendors to set things up. I am going for it, even though it is expensive. I can afford it at this point in my life. The issue is that some people are talking about me, saying that I’m being extravagant. I want to have my party, but I hate these rumors and comments. I feel like I deserve to have a good time for this turning point in my life. How can I get people to realize that this party is something I can afford and want to do, but I don’t want to hear their comments about it? -- Party On

DEAR PARTY ON: Do not indulge the naysayers. Create a guest list of people who genuinely support you. Invite them only. Let people say what they will about your party. Most important is for you and your guests to enjoy yourselves.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I thought I was lucky when I met my girlfriend. We both work in the same field and are super-dedicated to our jobs. We are at the beginning of our careers, and we are both all-in on the hustle of making things work. This was great at first. Then I got a couple of gigs where I got some shine and some dollars. When I called to tell my girlfriend about it, she got her back up. She said she was proud of me, but I could tell she was jealous. Instead of asking me about what happened and how I got the gig, she started talking about something that she was working on. It was weird.

I’m a little older than my girlfriend, so I have a couple of years more time working. It’s probably just me working longer than got me a gig first. Who knows? What I don’t understand is why she wouldn’t be happy for me. This has happened more than once, and I'm not sure how to deal with it. When I ask her to be happy for me, she says I’m overreacting. How can I get her to lay off the jealous behavior? -- Jealous Girlfriend

DEAR JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND: Jealousy is extremely difficult to manage, mainly because it requires the one who is jealous to neutralize their feelings. There’s little that you can do to make things better. What you can try to do is to encourage your girlfriend by consistently celebrating the small steps that help to get her to her goals. She will probably like that.

This may not change how she feels about you and your successes. You deserve a girlfriend who wants you to fulfill your dreams as she works to fulfill hers. Pay attention to how things evolve. If she continues to exhibit jealous behavior, she is not the woman for you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage daughter told me something revealing about a couple of her friends at school. We have an excellent rapport, which is why she shared this with me. A week later, I was at a party with a group of friends, and, after a few drinks, I told one of the moms what my daughter had told me. I didn’t mean to share what turned out to be confidential information, but I did it, and now all hell has broken loose. It’s my fault. I apologized to my daughter for talking about something that she shared with me privately, but I feel horrible. I don’t want to lose my daughter’s trust. What can I do? -- Broken Confidence

DEAR BROKEN CONFIDENCE: Promise your daughter that you will never betray her trust again -- unless it is a life-or-death situation. The "life-or-death" caveat is important because you are still the parent. If a revelation is unsafe, you may need to address it. But generally, let your daughter know that you will agree to keep information private between you. This is the only way to get her to continue talking to you about her feelings and friend dynamics. It may take time for her to tell you more secrets. You need to be patient.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)